Post by RT on Jun 1, 2019 4:15:10 GMT
ROUND 1
PI
PI
Wife & 🤯 proudly present...
In honor of the extreme...
In memoriam zap & @fezz...
A little something that'll hopefully make shinobimusashi & Kilgore smile...
ECW: Night of the Living Dead
Tornado Tag Team Match for the ECW Tag Team Title: The Trailer Park Boys (Jamie Noble & Jimmy Wayne Yang) (c) vs. The Supernatural Disasters (Hurricane & Tsunami [i.e., a masked Tajiri])
We'll kick the card off with classic cruiserweight action in the vein of the peak Tajiri/Super Crazy/Little Guido/Jerry Lynn stuff from latter day ECW... only in chaotic tag team tornado format! The import of the tornado stipulation isn't lost on the participants, as the reigning champions are particularly sensitive to twisters considering their mobile home living arrangements... whereas the challengers are right at home with the weather event inspired match type, as the superhero tandem draw inspiration and perhaps even power from some of mother nature's nastiest natural disasters.
By the way, not to be racist or anything (shut up, PB ... -_-) but Tsunami is Tajiri in a mask and ring attire similar to Hurricane's but with a red color theme instead of green.
Anyway...
In the buildup to this title match, we've been treated to every possible singles match combo between the four participants. Things escalated from just business to personal when Tsunami humiliated an interfering Noble with the red mist during the match between Tsunami and JWY. As retribution, Noble mocked Tsunami in Noble's match against Hurricane with a Busch Light mist en route to scoring the pinfall. In the final singles match before ECW:NotLD, which pit Noble against Tsunami, Tsunami accidentally blinded Mighty Molly with the red mist when Noble ducked out of harm's way at the last second. As a result, there's the tinsiest bit of tension between Hurricane and Tsunami headed into their title match which just might prove to be the opening that the champs need to retain their gold (and more importantly the big prize money that comes along with being champs).
*****
Awesome Kong vs. Mighty Molly
The brave Mighty Molly, overcoming her recent blindness only a day before ECW:NotLD, has set out to overcome the monstrous behemoth Kong in a clash with women's title contention implications.
An aggravated Kong views the caped crusaderette as a mere nuisance of a speed bump in the road to bigger and better things though.
Trailblazing a path of destruction, Kong has made clear her intentions to not only capture the women's title in short order but also the TV and world title and even tag titles... all by herself. Because there's no stopping Awesome.
*****
Bob Backlund vs. Doink the Clown
"Mister" Backlund has had enough of the double layer disrespect dished out by that damn clown. On one level, he's sick of how Doink has been not only teasing and tormenting him but also the kiddies as well (but what "kiddies" even attend an ECW show... good god, think of the children!). On another level, in Bobby Boy's eyes, Matt Borne's "Doink" gimmick just might be the most offensive affront to his beloved sport of pro wrestling as it literally equates it to a circus sideshow joke.
All of the clown's tricks have clearly caused Backlund to snap, and he's found himself on the frontlines of a one man war to kill the clown. Backlund has sworn to procure the dreaded crossface chicken wing on Doink and rip his arm clean off.
On the go-home show, Doink comes out dressed in a chicken suit with a bucket of buffalo wings to mock Backlund and show he's not deterred by the Mad Mister. Backlund rushes the ring, taking the chicken suited doofus down to the mat with a double leg takedown and procures the crossface chicken wing (with an added body scissors for good measure)... only for the real (or another!?) Doink to come out from beneath the ring and KO Backlund from behind with a loaded rubber chicken.
*****
Falls Count Anywhere Chairs Match: Balls Mahoney vs. La Parka
Despite their bond over their shared love of cold steel seating implements, the Chair Swingin' Freak and Chairman of ECW find themselves at perpetual odds in the argument over who wields a better chair.
To settle the dispute once and for all, Balls and Park have agreed to hash it out in a falls count anywhere chairs match... except there's a catch: there's no pinfalls; the "fall" must be a literal one... like in a last man standing match, like a KO. Because why not!?
Expect it to get as brutal as Rock/Mankind at the 1999 Royal Rumble, but also with that classic ECW scene where fans overwhelm the ring with a shower of steel chairs when prompted by the crazed competitors.
*****
ECW Television Title: Rhyno (c) vs. Big Show
"The War Machine" vs. "The Weapon of Mass Destruction" in a hoss bombfest for the TV title.
To be clear, this is Rhyno circa 2001. And this Big Show is a hybrid of all his best versions: the youthful athleticism from his WCW days, the surprisingly shredded bod from current day, and the look and ring gear of late 2002... which, along with the highest and nastiest chokeslam in the business, makes him the bigger/better/badder version of 911 for this ECW. After weeks of just randomly appearing during Rhyno's matches and chokeslamming both the champion and his various challengers, Big Show has earned the Manbeast's intensely focused attention. In fact, it was Rhyno who challenged Show to this match (even offering to put the title on the line as extra incentive for Show to accept).
It's literally a clash of unstoppable force and immovable object, as the charging rhino aims to gore the giant to the ground.
*****
ECW Women's Title: Jazz (c) vs. Ronda Rousey
The Baddest Bitch in the Bayou, the Fiercest Female Fighting Force since Joan of Arc, the Barbie Breaking Bad Ass... a.k.a. JAZZ has had a stranglehold on the gold and, through a series of impressively violent title defenses, has successfully intimated away most of the rest of ECW's rebuilding women's division.
Enter a relatively humble newcomer who's coming in with a lot of external fanfare: "Rowdy" Ronda Rousey. Given her incredible MMA credentials, as well as the parsed thin division, Rousey has essentially walked into ECW and waltzed into a title match for her pro wrestling debut. Fellow MMA legend turned pro wrestler Ken Shamrock has welcomed Rousey into the Lion's Den and offered to help train her for a successful transition from the Octagon to the squared circle.
Jazz has shown to be a bit of a conflicted champion over the notion of this new challenger. Jazz is happy to have some new blood in the water and fresh meat to sink her shark teeth into, but she's also somewhat put off by the idea of some rookie outsider being deemed worthy of debuting against the champ (in a title match, no less). Jazz has vowed to welcome Rousey to ECW and the women's division at NotLD the only way she knows how: with extreme violence.
*****
"Triple Threat" Triple Threat for the ECW World Title: Taz (c) vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu
After vanquishing the *other* Triple Threat in a high stakes loser leaves ECW match, the uneasy alliance between RVD and Sabu and World Champion Taz has crumbled and the previously quiet uneasiness has turned into open rivalry between the three men.
As "thanks" for aiding world champeen Taz in ridding ECW of the *other* Triple Threat faction, the diabolical booker man (I assume I'm not allowed to name drop Heyman if I didn't actually draft him) has "rewarded" RVD and Sabu with a world title shot. You read that right: a world title shot... as in one... for the both of them (not each)... to be split King Solomon style and shared at the same time... in a Triple Threat Triple Threat! The match type inherently depriving Taz of the champion's advantage is Taz's "thanks" for his efforts.
I debated making this a 3-Way Dance to truly fit the ECW vibe, but I couldn't avoid the stupid word play. Also, my understanding is that 3-Way Dances are elimination matches... which I've never really been a fan of, except in rare instances. The eliminations back you into more of a booking corner. I like the open-ended-ness (i thought that was a word, but spell check says no?) of a triple threat match where it's one fall to a finish, and thus allows one of the "losers" to come out on the other side with a semi valid claim that he wasn't defeated and therefore didn't lose. Anyway... With an iron man match also on this card, I also didn't want two (especially back-to-back) multi-fall matches. So... yeah.
TRIPLE THREAT IMPLODES!!!~
*****
"The Final Encounter" Iron Man Match (w/ special guest referee Ken Shamrock): Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit
Quite possibly one of my favorite wrestling rivalries of all time, at least in so far as the in-ring magic that these two produced whenever they stepped into the squared circle together... whether as opponents or begrudging tag team partners. Over the course of 4 years or so, they've tangled in nearly every match type except the one which always seemed like it would've been most fitting for a true final encounter... an iron man match. So, for the pleasure of my own imagination if no one else's, I'm running the iron man match that should've been at ECW:NotLD.
In the context of this alternate ECW, let's say the buildup is something like this: Angle and Benoit's paths have paralleled each other and crossed at many high profile intersections over the past four years. They've traded wins, won titles (individually and together), and proven to be each other's in-ring equal... except Angle has a chip on his shoulder from winning Olympic gold with a broken frickin' neck, so he refuses to acknowledge Benoit as his true peer. Angle also has the added claim that his wins over Benoit came when they really counted; i.e., on the grandest PPV stages and/or when world titles or his gold medals were on the line.
Angle is willing to "stoop to Benoit's level" to wrestle Benoit one more time in order to conclude their "lopsided" rivalry and definitively prove once and for all that he's not only the better wrestler but in fact the greatest wrestler in the world. Brimming with perhaps a bit too much hubris, Angle promises to defeat Benoit by a multi-fall margin within regulation time when they meet in the iron man at ECW:NotLD. The ever-intense, ever-hungry Benoit is for sure up to the challenge and counters Angle's promise with a promise of his own: Benoit promises to punctuate his victory at ECW:NotLD by forcing Angle to tap out as the final fall.
Considering the participants and the magnitude of this match, a special referee has been deemed necessary... and considering his own background as well as his experience officiating big time matches, no other candidate appeared more qualified than Ken Shamrock. Benoit seemed nonplussed about Shamrock being announced as the special guest ref. Angle, however, responded by warning Shamrock to stay out of his way or else he might find himself in an Angle-applied ankle lock. Shamrock has said he has no skin in the game and certainly isn't intimated by either Angle or Benoit, so he'll have no problem calling the action straight down the middle and enforcing the rules of the match even if things get heated.
*****
LIVE! from the ECW Arena
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
FUCK IT!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++
LONY
LONY
Insanely Awesome Wrestling
Proudly Presents
A New Beginning
***************
IAW Heavyweight Championship
Singles Match
Kenny Omega vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi
IAW Tag Team Championships
Three Team TLC Match
Hardy Boyz vs. Latin American Xchange vs. The Revival
The Student vs. The Teacher
Singles Match
Aleister Black w/ Zelina Vega vs. Nigel McGuinness
Tag Team Match
American Alpha vs. The WGTT
Singles Match
Alexa Bliss vs. Zelina Vega
IAW Fusion Championship*
Four Way Elimination Match
Buddy Murphy vs. KUSHIDA vs. PJ Black vs. Rush
*It's basically an X-Division/Junior Heavyweight Title
Proudly Presents
A New Beginning
***************
IAW Heavyweight Championship
Singles Match
Kenny Omega vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi
IAW Tag Team Championships
Three Team TLC Match
Hardy Boyz vs. Latin American Xchange vs. The Revival
The Student vs. The Teacher
Singles Match
Aleister Black w/ Zelina Vega vs. Nigel McGuinness
Tag Team Match
American Alpha vs. The WGTT
Singles Match
Alexa Bliss vs. Zelina Vega
IAW Fusion Championship*
Four Way Elimination Match
Buddy Murphy vs. KUSHIDA vs. PJ Black vs. Rush
*It's basically an X-Division/Junior Heavyweight Title
