WrestleSystemin partnership withWilliam Patrick Corgan'sNational Wrestling Allianceproudly presents:PowerrrRumbleIron Gauntlet Series
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Joe Galli and Stu Bennett are our hosts and commentary team for the evening. They welcome viewers watching the simulcast on KDKA and YouTube live stream; touch on WrestleSystem's partnership with the National Wrestling Alliance and connection to the Pittsburgh-based charity Tickets for Kids; walk through the concepts underpinning the PowerrrRumble and Iron Gauntlet Series; and express their shared excitement over being a part of history here tonight. Stu then grabs a house mic, gets in the ring, welcomes the fans in attendance, explains the rules of the PowerrrRumble match, and finally gets things underway by introducing the first two entrants in the first-ever PowerrrRumble...
Entrant #1: Zane Dawsonand...
Entrant #2: Dave DawsonÂ
We kick things off with a brother vs. brother brouhaha, almost just to prove anything can happen and it's every man for himself in the PowerrrRumble!
There's no hesitation in either Dawson as they lunge for each other with wild fists flying as soon as the timekeeper rings the opening bell.
Evenly matched, Zane and Dave brawl back and forth around the ring for the next two minutes.
The only real spot of note is when they start trading running shoulder blocks. Neither Dawson can budge the other... that is until Zane crisscrosses the ring twice for some extra momentum and connects with a jumping shoulder block, sending Dave tumbling through the ropes and out onto the apron.
The countdown clock ticks away to zero with the fans chanting along. The buzzer sounds, signaling the next entrant...
Entrant #3: Scott SteinerHoller if you hear me! The blare of Big Poppa Pump's sirens drown out the echo of the buzzer as Steiner marches toward the ring, stopping here and there on the way to flex his peaks for all his freaks.
The Dawsons put a pause to their sibling rivalry, agree to join forces, and turn their collective attention toward Steiner as he approaches.
The Dawsons pounce on Steiner as he enters the ring, stomping away at him and dropping a few elbow and knee drops on him for good measure.
The Dawsons then spend the next two minutes working Steiner over in the corner, taking turns clubbering him until the countdown clock reaches zero again...
4: Jax DaneAs Dane makes his way to the ring, Steiner starts fighting back out of the corner against the Dawsons.
Steiner backs Zane off with a boot to the midsection, then stuns Dave with a soccer hooligan headbutt, before turning back to Zane and planting him with an impressive spinning belly-to-belly side suplex.
Steiner punctuates his comeback by dumping a still-stunned Dave over the top rope and out to the floor with a Steinerliner to score the first-ever elimination in PowerrrRumble history!
Elimination #1: Dave Dawson by Scott SteinerDane slides into the ring and joins Zane in double-teaming Steiner from behind in an attempt to halt Steiner's mounting momentum... but Steiner is on a roll now and seemingly impervious to pain, and he starts handing out suplexes like Halloween candy.
The fans are too caught up in the suplex clinic to notice the countdown clock ticking away, but the buzzer catches everyone's attention...
Entrant #5: Matt CrossCross sprints down to the ring, leaps up onto the apron, then up onto the top rope, and launches himself into the ring with a springboard missile dropkick that stuns and staggers Steiner.
Steiner stumbles backwards into the far ropes, and his once-massive arms become ensnared between the top and middle ropes.
Zane, Dane, and Cross all work together to free Steiner from the ropes so that they can then try to triple-team dump him.
Once freed, however, Steiner unleashes another barrage of suplexes: there's another belly-to-belly side suplex for Zane; then a T-bone for Dane; and a gutwrench for Cross. Steiner puts so much torque into the gutwrench that Cross flips through the air and lands with a hard belly flop after over-rotating by half a rotation. ("Take that, ya flippy fuck!" - Steiner)
Even though submissions don't really count for much in the context of a PowerrrRumble, Steiner slaps a Steiner Recliner on Zane because... well, because he can. No one can stop Big Poppa Pump! Also, it gives Steiner some time to rest and catch his breath.
Dane, wanting no part of Steiner for the moment, goes over and starts beating up on Cross in the corner.
The fans start chanting as the countdown clock ticks down to zero and the buzzer sounds...
Entrant #6: Caleb KonleyDane signals to Steiner, who releases Zane from the Recliner. Dane then Irish whips Cross into Steiner's waiting arms, and Steiner sends Cross SAILING!!~ over the top rope, out to the floor, and crashing onto Konley with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Holy shit!
Elimination #2: Matt Cross by Scott SteinerÂ
Steiner goes around choking everybody with a big smile on his face. He’s clearly enjoying this.
Konley takes almost a full two minutes to recover on the floor. He finally enters the ring just before the next buzzer...
Entrant #7: JocephusShowing zero trepidation, Jocephus makes a beeline for Steiner... and walks right into a big suplex.
Steiner then puts Jocephus in the Steiner Recliner. Konley peppers Steiner with a few forearms from behind, but Steiner doesn't seem to care or even notice as he continues torturing Jocephus in the Recliner.
The buzzer goes off, and the fans go mild for...Â
Entrant #8: CW AndersonCW slides into the ring on one side, while Steiner shitcans a practically lifeless Jocephus over the top rope and out to the floor on the other side.
Elimination #3: Jocephus by Scott SteinerThe action slows down a bit with five participants in the ring and Steiner finding himself a bit winded again.
On commentary, Galli notes how impressed he is with Zane for lasting so long (shut up, Joe... it hasn't really been THAT long). Instead of humoring Joe and partaking in Joe's idiocy, Stu counts down with the clock: 3... 2... 1... ZERO!
Entrant #9: PJ HawxDane unceremoniously dumps Zane over the top rope and out to the floor just as Galli stops sucking Zane's dick on commentary over Zane's impressive girth and longevity.
Elimination #4: Zane Dawson by Jax DaneDane then goes after PJ and chucks him over the top rope... but PJ skins the cat back in and catches an unsuspecting Dane with a picture-perfect standing dropkick. The dropkick sends Dane over the top rope on the opposite side, but Dane hangs on. Two great athletes showing off their stuff right there. Yeeaaahhh, boiii!!!
Anyway...
Steiner catches a breather while choking CW in the corner and continuing to ignore Konley's ineffective forearms.
The countdown clock ticks to zero for the tenth time tonight...
Entrant #10: Ricky MortonAs Morton hops and skips down to the ring, Jocephus comes limping back out behind him with a burlap sack in hand.
Morton climbs into the ring and joins the fray, throwing surprisingly crisp old man punches indiscriminately in every direction. For whatever reason, of all the participants in the ring, Morton's old man punches seem to have the most notable effect on Konley.
Meanwhile, Jocephus reaches the ring and climbs up onto the apron. He taunts Steiner to draw Big Poppa Pump near, then pulls a MILK SNAKE!!~ out of his sack, and tosses the serpent onto Steiner!
Mistaking the nonvenomous milk snake for a highly venomous coral snake (which is an easy mistake to make given their confusingly similar coloration), Steiner is overcome by justified fear. He backpedals across the ringand jumps out to the floor over the top rope on the other side... eliminating himself as he flees to safety through the crowd.
Elimination #5: Scott Steiner by himselfÂ
The fans go nuts for all of this, chanting "JO-SEE-FUSS!! JO-SEE-FUSS!!" as Jocephus retrieves the milk snake from the ring and then takes off through the crowd, chasing after Steiner.
We're back down to five participants in the ring: Dane, Konley, PJ, CW, and Morton. But only for a few seconds, as the buzzer signals...
Entrant #11: Zicky DiceDice encounters Dane first, and they start trading blows. On commentary, Galli points out how rare it is to see two "bad guys" like Dane and Dice go at it... but in a PowerrrRumble, anything goes! (But also, DON'T BREAK KAYFABE, Joe! Jayzus, bro.)
Dane starts gaining an upper hand over Dice, as more of his punches are landing than Dice's. Dice responds with a double eye poke to get some separation. Dice then wanders over and joins Konley in double-teaming PJ. Meanwhile, Morton leans on CW in a corner.
Dice and Konley are close to eliminating PJ as the clock strikes zero...
Entrant #12: Ricky StarksStarks sprints down to the ring, officially enters in high-flying style with a springboard clothesline on Dice, and follows up with a series of scintillating standing dropkicks on the NWA TV Champ.
PJ fights off Konley with some pointed elbows right to the middle of Konley's forehead.
In the corner, Morton mounts CW for the ten punch spot. It takes Morton a moment to realize the fans aren't counting along with his punches; they're counting down along with the countdown clock...
Entrant #13: The PopePope takes his sweet time strutting down to the ring. He climbs in but makes a point of avoiding any of the other participants.
Meanwhile, Dane takes a moment in the corner to regain his sight after the double eye poke from Dice.
Morton & Starks team up for a double Ricky clothesline on Dice, knocking him over the top rope and out of the ring. Dice lands on his feet, but that doesn't matter; he's been eliminated!
Elimination #6: Zicky Dice by Rick Morton & Ricky StarksÂ
Dice can't believe it. Outlandish! Succumbing to frustration, he rips his fanny pack off, throws it down, and stomps a mud hole in it... but then realizes what he's doing, stops in a dead panic, picks the fanny pack back up, cradles it in his arms with a look of care and concern as if the damn thing was an injured puppy, and then takes off running toward the back screaming for medical attention.
Anyway, back in the ring...
PJ goes up to the top turnbuckle, apparently not realizing the risk of such a strategy when competing in a PowerrrRumble. And he pays for it, as Konley catches him with a springboard enzuigiri. PJ is almost eliminated as he slumps off the top turnbuckle and falls down onto the ring apron.
But PJ is saved by the buzzer...
Entrant #14: Luke HawxRight on cue, PJ's dad slash tag team partner comes to the rescue. Luke helps shove PJ back into the ring before entering himself.
Morton whips CW toward Luke & PJ. Father and son work together, hitting a double back elbow on CW followed by a double dropkick to eliminate him.
Elimination #7: CW Anderson by Hawx AerieMorton stops to watch and applaud the tag team work of Hawx Aerie like an idiot, leaving himself open to be double-teamed from behind by Pope and Dane.
Meanwhile, Starks hits a flying forearm on Konley to knock him over the top rope. Konley hangs in there though and recovers on the apron.
Everyone is just milling around now, trying to figure out what to do next. Then the countdown clock reaches zero...
Entrant #15: James StormÂ
We're at the halfway point, ladies and germs!
Storm is double-fisting beer bottles and chugging from both at the same time as he makes his way toward the ring. Fans are loving it!
Once in the ring, Storm goes after Pope first. Seeing an opening, Konley goes after Storm and attacks from behind. But for whatever reason, Konley's forearms from behind are having zero effect on anyone tonight. Storm turns around and pops Konley in the kisser with a superkick. The impact of the superkick sends Konley carthweeling out to the floor over the top rope like some sort of flippy fuck (to steal a Steinerism).
Elimination #9: Caleb Konley by James StormÂ
Storm goes after Dane. They end up in one corner of the ring. Luke & PJ pair off against Ricky & Ricky in another corner. Pope chills in a third, casually observing the action (or lack thereof).
Fans: 3... 2... 1... ZERO!
Buzzer: ERRRNNGGHHH!!!~
Entrant #16: Beer City BruiserPJ leaves his dad to be double-teamed by Ricky & Ricky, and turns and superkicks BCB as BCB is entering the ring... but BCB just brushes it off, and clobbers PJ with a stiff clothesline.
Luke is fares better than his son despite the numbers disadvantage. He reverses a double-team suplex attempt by Ricky & Ricky into a double DDT. Meanwhile, Pope continues chilling by himself.
Storm downs Dane with a superkick that is approximately 100x more impactful than PJ's superkick on BCB. Storm then turns and joins BCB in double-teaming PJ with double back elbows off of a hard Irish whip. Pretty random.
Storm goes back after Dane, and BCB goes up to the top turnbuckle. Maybe BCB wants to show PJ how to fly in a PowerrrRumble? But BCB doesn't get the chance, as Luke saves his son again; this time punching BCB in the penis, which causes BCB to slip and crotch himself on the top rope. OUCH!
Entrant #17: Brian MilonasÂ
It's a bit of deja vu as BCB's Bouncer tag team partner comes out just in time to save him from being eliminated after he topples off the top turnbuckle and lands on the apron. Like Luke did to PJ earlier in the match, Milonas rolls BCB back into the ring.
There's relatively little action... until BCB suddenly charges across the ring and crushes Luke with running jumping Thesz press. Milonas follows that up with a running jumping Earthquake-style butt drop on Luke. Milonas then peels Luke's flattened carcass off the canvas and shitcans it out to the floor over the top rope.
Elimination #10: Luke Hawx by Brian MilonasÂ
With his daddy savior now gone, PJ is easy prey for the Bouncers. Storm tries to help PJ, and they join forces and take turns blasting the Bouncers with superkicks. Storm's are still roughly 100x more effective than PJ's (PJ's superkicks are about as effective as Konley's forearms).
Despite PJ's relatively ineffective superkicks, Storm and PJ have the Bouncers reeling. Then, without warning, Storm turns on PJ and blasts him with a superkick. The force of the sudden superkick sends PJ over the top rope. PJ hangs on and attempts to skin the cat back in again... but a bum-rushing BCB sends an inverted PJ flying into the guardrail with a charging hip check.
Elimination #11: PJ Hawx by James Storm & Beer City BruiserÂ
The Bouncers turn their attention to Storm now and start double-team clubbering him. Meanwhile, Ricky & Ricky double-team pepper Dane with quick strikes and dropkicks. Then they all switch everything up, with Ricky & Ricky squaring off against the Bouncers and Dane blasting Storm with a stiff elbow.
Meanwhile, Pope's still chillin' like a villain in the corner. To entertain himself, Pope pretends to be a band conductor leading the fans through the countdown to the next entrant...
Entrant #18: Eli DrakeBiggest pop of the night thus far. YEEEAAHHH!! YEEAAAHH!! YEEEAAHHH!! Eli runs in and immediately saves his Muscle Bottoms tag team partner Storm from being elminated by Dane, and then dumps Dane out to the floor over the top rope.
Elimination #11: Jax Dane by Eli DrakeÂ
Milonas pounces on Eli from behind, but Eli shakes it off. Eli and Milonas start trading big right hands. Meanwhile, Starks is taking it to the other half of the Bouncers. Storm stumbles over and staggers both Starks and BCB with superkicks. Storm then sends both Starks and BCB over the top rope and out onto the apron with an impressive double clothesline.
Starks and BCB get to their feet on the apron and start elbowing each other in the ribs. Storm goes for a running big boot, but Starks and BCB move out of the way. Storm gets his leg hung up over the top rope. Thinking quick, BCB grabs Starks by the back of his head and improvises a modified codebreaker using the knee of Storm's hung-up leg. The move looks violent as fuck! The KO'd Starks collapses to the floor.
Elimination #12: Ricky Starks by James Storm & Beer City BruiserÂ
BCB then rakes Storms' eyes to buy himself enough time to climb back into the ring.
Pope finally joins the fray, joining forces with the Bouncers in triple-teaming Eli. On commentary, Galli wonders aloud: why isn't Storm helping Eli!? (it's not like the Muscle Bottoms are the Mega Powers... -_-)
Pope leaves Eli in the hands of the Bouncers and turns his attention to Morton... who comes crashing down onto Pope off the top rope with a flying crossbody press!
Buzzer: ERRRNNGGHHH!!!~
Entrant #19: Robert GibsonÂ
Gibson old man hobble runs down to the ring. Just as he slides in, Pope clotheslines Morton out. No RnRx reunion and/or confrontation in this PowerrrRumble!
Elimination #13: Ricky Morton by The PopeÂ
The story emerging overall here is Eli fending off both Bouncers without backup from Storm; meanwhile, Storm is preoccupied with Pope and Gibson as the three of them trade blows in some sort of strange love triangle on the opposite side of the ring.
Eli isn't totally above resorting to underhanded tactics, and he rakes BCB's eyes to buy himself a bit of breathing room. Then, in an unbelievable display of strength, Eli scoops Milonas up into body slam position... carries him across the ring... and drops the behemoth Bouncer throat-first across the top rope! Eli then turns his attention to BCB and blasts him with a running big boot that would've made the late Andrew "Test" Martin proud.
In response to Eli's impressive offense, the fans are chanting "E-LI-DRAKE" instead of chanting along with the countdown clock. The clock strikes zero. The buzzer sounds...
Entrant #20: Sal RinauroÂ
While Eli continues to fend off both Bouncers by himself, Sal joins the love triangle to turn it into a four-way affair.
Not learning a lesson from before, BCB goes up to the top turnbuckle again. Eli catches him there, and BCB takes a Flair bump after getting tossed to the mat. Clearly a tribute to the only NWA World Heavyweight Champion greater than Slick Nick.
Sal charges at Eli, hoping to catch him off guard after the big slam off the top on BCB... but Eli sees Sal, ducks down, pops back up, and sends Sal over the top rope and out to the floor with a big back body drop!
Elimination #14: Sal Rinauro by Eli DrakeÂ
Gibson charges Eli now, only to meet the same fate as our pal Sal... big back body drop over the top rope to the floor!
Elimination #15: Robert Gibson by Eli DrakeÂ
We're left with five in the ring: Pope, the Bouncers, and the Muscle Bottoms! Storm finally backs Eli up, as it has now become a de facto 3-on-2 handicap match for the next minute and change.
Fans and Stu chant in unison as the countdown clock reaches zero yet again...
Entrant #21: Royce IsaacsÂ
Royce comes out with May Valentine on his arm.
As Royce is making his way to the ring, Eli eliminates both Bouncers simultaneously with a double clothesline (Choosing to focus on Pope, Storm had left Eli to fend for himself again against both Bouncers.)
Elimination #16 & 17: Beer City Bruiser & Brian Milonas by Eli DrakeÂ
Royce finally gets down to the ring, climbs up and poses on the apron, steps into the ring... Eli charges, connects with a clothesline, and... how embarrassing! Eli has been eliminated in less than two seconds. That's not a record you want to set.
Elimination #18: Royce Isaacs by Eli DrakeÂ
Royce throws a temper tantrum at ringside and demands a do-over. Embarrassed on behalf of her beau, May just shakes her head and walks back to the back by herself.
In pretty rapid fire succession, the field has been thinned down to three men: Eli, Storm, and Pope.
As Eli takes a moment to catch his breath, Pope and Storm lock up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up.
Pope and Storm jockey for position, and they end up pressed up against the ropes. Eli sees them, goes over, lifts Pope up to dump him over the top rope... and Pope's gone; just like that!
**BUT!!!**
While dumping Pope, Eli also
accidentally dumps his Muscle Bottoms tag team partner Storm. CONTROVERSY!!!
Elimination #19 & 20: The Pope and James Storm by Eli DrakeStorm is livid. The hotheaded cowboy reenters the ring illegally and confronts his tag team partner. Storm yells at Eli for eliminating him. Eli tells Storm to calm down; "it's Saul Goodman".
On commentary, Galli takes Storm’s side while Stu defend Eli. Eli was only trying to help Storm; where was Storm whenever the Bouncers were double-teaming Eli?
ODB make a surprise appearance, coming out with two six packs of beer and getting between the Muscle Bottoms. Thanks to ODB's facilitation, cooler heads prevail. Storm shakes Eli's hand, the Muscle Bottoms hug, and Storm leaves with ODB. On commentary, Galli plugs the upcoming Crockett Cup while simultaneously hypothesizing that this altercation and resulting tension could have some delayed onset effects on the Muscle Bottom's functionality as a tag team. Stu speculates it's nothing a cold beer or two or six can't resolve.
Eli shakes it all off and settles into a ready stance as the countdown clock ticks to zero...
Entrant #22: Aron StevensPoor Aron must go one-on-one with the Great One Lite (a.k.a. Eli), as it's just the two of them in the PowerrrRumble at this point. Aron points over Eli's shoulder and shouts "look over there", and Eli bites on the distraction. Aron charges at Eli as Eli is "looking over there", but Eli turns back around in the nick of time and catches Aron with a beautiful scoop slam. Aron pops up right into a second scoop slam. And then back up for a third! Eli is just having his way with the third-degree NWA National Champion.
Eli picks Aron up and whips him into the corner. Aron eats the turnbuckle sternum-first a la Bret Hart. Eli picks Aron up again, and whips him into the opposite corner. Aron takes another Bret bump. Eli picks Aron up a third time, whips him into the ropes, and lowers his head in preparation for a big back body drop...
...but Aron stops on the rebound off the ropes, and spikes Eli with a quick Foley-style piledriver. The fans boo Aron's clever counter. Or maybe they're just booing him regardless of the counter? Anyway... To spite the fans, Aron follows up with a Lawler-style piledriver on Eli. The fans boo Aron even more, so he completes the piledriver hat trick by hitting a jumping spinning variation (think Tommy Dreamer's titty-popping piledriver on Francine in glory days ECW). The fans boo, and boo, and boo... but Aron is all like: CASH ME OUTSIDE, HOW 'BOUT DAH!
The fans are booing too loud to even hear the buzzer go off...
Entrant #23: The Question MarkOh shit; it's Aron’s tag team partner slash sensei in Mongrovian KAH-RAH-TAY!
Instead of eliminating Eli, Aron & QM take the opportunity to demonstrate their mastery of KAH-RAH-TAY. They take turns holding Eli up and in place for KAH-RAH-TAY chops, kicks, and strikes with various other body parts.
Aron gets overzealous as he tries to impress his sensei, and he accidentally misses Eli on a Mongrovian Spike attempt and catches QM in the throat instead. Eli capitalizes on the miss, and clunks craniums with a double noggin knocker on Aron & QM.
Eli tries to further capitalize, but his neck is in too much pain from all those piledrivers from Aron. The numbers game overwhelms Eli, and Aron & QM ultimately eliminate him with a double Mongrovian Spike.
Elimination #21: Eli Drake by Aron Stevens & The Question MarkEMTs come down to ringside to check on Eli. Meanwhile, The KAH-RAH-TAY Masters spend the next minute+ celebrating together in the ring and KAH-RAH-TAY chopping the air as a means of intimidating the next entrant...
Entrant #24: Trevor MurdochTrevor hits the ring like a bull raging through a china shop. He sends Aron bouncing all around the ring with one big running shoulder block after another.
Picking his spot, QM interjects himself into the situation to momentarily stun Trevor with a short-arm Mongrovian Spike.
Aron starts running the ropes to return the shoulder block favor to Trevor. However, Aron's first shoulder block merely staggers the Coffeyville Colossus. So Aron hits the ropes again for another shoulder block. This one gets Trevor teetering but not off his feet. Aron starts running the ropes again, going for a third shoulder block. Eli (who has refused medical attention at ringside) low bridges the top rope, which causes Aron to tumble out of the ring.
Elimination #22: Aron Stevens by Eli DrakeEli and Aron brawl up the entrance aisle. Back in the ring, QM sends Trevor FLYING!!~ from one side to another with a *MONGROVIAN* shoulder block. On commentary, Stu notes that QM likely displayed that specific technique for Aron's benefit so that Aron can watch the tape back later, learn, and then practice to further perfect Aron's own KAH-RAH-TAY.
Then the buzzer goes off, startling QM.
Entrant #25: Eddie KingstonEddie jogs out, slides into the ring, and immediately goes after QM. A recovering Trevor joins forces with Eddie, forming an impromptu North-South/East-West Connection. Trevor & Eddie double-team QM until QM summons the POWERRR OF MONGROVIA!!~ to fight off his assailants. I guess it's like Hulk drawing on the energy of his Hulkamaniacs to hulk up when he's in dire situations? Anyway... On commentary, Stu questions if anyone will be able to eliminate QM from the PowerrrRumble if QM is able to summon this super power at will and channel it so effectively toward his opponents.
QM spends the remainder of this two-minute interval showcasing KAH-RAY-TAY movez!!~ on Trevor & Eddie.
3... 2... 1... ZERO!
Entrant #26: Thom LatimerGerard Butler's doppleganger comes out and joins QM in beating down on Trevor & Eddie. On commentary, Galli question's Thom's strategy: Why isn't Thom helping Trevor & Eddie to eliminate QM!? QM is clearly the biggest threat left in the ring!
Just as the words leave Galli's dick-sucking lips, Thom turns toward QM and hoists him up overhead with an impressive gorilla press... but it's just for QM to hit an assisted body splash on Eddie.Â
QM continues to work over Eddie while Thom clubbers Trevor in the corner.
The fans are getting antsy and desperate for something, and they chant loudly as the countdown clock ticks to zero...
Entrant #27: Tim StormHuge pop for Mama Storm's Baby Boy! Tim marches out with a big ol' smile plastered on his face. But that smile disappears as soon as he steps into the ring and confronts QM. QM sizes Tim up, steps back, winds up, and lunges at Tim with a Mongrovian Spike... but Tim blocks it! A wild slugfest breaks out between Tim and QM. Stu starts marking out over the slugfest on commentary. Get a grip, Stu (lest you be renamed Matt Striker)!
Meanwhile, with Tim taking QM out of the picture, Trevor & Eddie are able to rally and they start double-teaming Thom in the corner.
The countdown clock ticks to zero again...
Entrant #28: Brody KingBrody's entrance prompts Galli & Stu to start discussing Villain Enterprises' adversary, NWA World Heavyweight Champion Nick Aldis.
Stu confirms Aldis is slated to be a participant in the PowerrrRumble, but says Aldis must have had a lucky draw as he clearly picked either #29 or #30.
Galli contests luck had nothing to do with it, suggesting instead that Slick Nick used his clout with the powers-that-be in WrestleSystem and the NWA to secure the #30 spot. (Thanks for the spoiler, Joe. Ugh!)
Back in the ring, Brody --as a proxy for Villian Enterprises leader, Marty Scurll-- lays waste to Thom --the proxy for StrictBiz's leader, Slick Nick.
Meanwhile, the North-South/East-West Connection implodes with Trevor and Eddie turning on each other.
Across the ring, the slugfest between Tim and QM still rages on!
The countdown clock hits zero for the second to last time tonight, and the buzzer signals the penultimate entrant...
Entrant #29: Marty ScurllHoly shit! Marty wasn't expected to be involved with this. Just goes to show... ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN IN A POWERRRRUMBLE!!!
Marty saunters to the ring twirling his umbrella while Galli & Stu lose their minds on commentary. Once in the ring, Marty joins Brody in double-teaming Thom.
Trevor and Eddie continue to tussle in their corner of the ring. In the opposite corner, the Tim-QM slugfest has devolved into Tim just holding QM in the corner and leaning on him. Guess they needed a shared breather after the intensity of their foray into fisticuffs?
The countdown clock finally strikes midnight; the buzzer sounds, signaling the final entrant into the first-ever PowerrrRumble; of course, it's none other than (thanks again, Joe)...
Entrant #30: Nick AldisNick comes out flanked by his old insurance policy Kamille. Nick stalks slowly down the entrance aisle, assessing the action in the ring. He's clearly not pleased with Marty and Brody's presence in the ring.
By the time Nick steps through the ropes, we've got eight guys left in the ring: QM, Tim, Thom, Trevor, Eddie, Brody, Marty, and... the National Treasure... the Resplendent One... the Real World's Champion... #30 and our odds-on favorite to win... Slick Nick!
Trevor and Eddie pause their mini beef and part ways for a bit; Trevor goes to help Tim with QM; Eddie goes immediately after Slick Nick, looking to make some sort of big statement at the NWA World Heavyweight Champion's expense.
Eddie gets some snappy jabs in on Nick before Nick cuts Eddie off with a knee to the gut. Nick whips Eddie into the corner, and Eddie takes the Flair bump up and over the turnbuckles and out onto the apron. Nick follows Eddie into the corner and blasts him with a forearm to knock Eddie off the apron for the elimination.
Elimination #23: Eddie Kingston by Nick AldisThom has rallied in the opposite corner, mounting some momentum against Marty & Brody. Brody stumbles back into Trevor off a big boot to the face from Thom, and Trevor responds by slapping a sleeper on Brody. Thom and Nick bumrush Trevor and Brody from the side, and work together to dump them both out to the floor over the top rope.
Elimination #24 & 25: Trevor Murdoch & Brody King by Nick Aldis & Thom LatimerMarty jumps onto Thom's back, but Thom shrugs the featherweight up onto his shoulder and into position for a running powerslam. Thom picks Marty up for another running powerslam, starts across the ring toward the opposite side... but Marty slips free and hits a standing dropkick from behind, which sends Thom tumbling over the top rope and out to the floor!
Elimination #26: Thom Latimer by Marty ScurllOur final four are QM, Tim, Marty, and... the National Treasure... the Resplendent One... the Real World's Champion... #30 and still our odds-on favorite to win... Slick Nick!!
Each participant backs into a separate corner. They share a moment during a four-way staredown to catch their breath and size up their remaining opponents.
Then Marty darts at QM unexpectedly... but QM sidesteps the charging Marty and chucks him out for the surprising elimination. Whoa, wait... WHAT!?!?
Elimination #27: Marty Scurll by The Question MarkThe ever-valiant Tim fights off QM & Nick as best he can. Tim downs Nick with a rock solid clothesline. But then QM downs Tim with a Mongrovian Spike.
QM goes up to the top turnbuckle and leaps off to deliver a diving Super Mongrovian Spike to Tim... but Nick gets in the way and end up taking the brunt of the blow! OH NO!!
QM hesitates and looks back and forth as he assesses whether to roll with the punches and continue the assault on Tim or pivot to the now-downed Nick. On commentary, Stu asks what the hell QM is waiting for!? Galli says he can practically hear the Jeopardy music in QM's head.
Before QM can make up his mind, a recovering Tim clubs him from behind. The force of the blow sends QM stumbling toward the ropes. Tim follows up with a somewhat clumsy-looking dropkick, which sends QM over the top and out to the floor. BUH-BYE!
Elimination #28: The Question Mark by Tim StormWe’re now down to two. Tim & Nick. Where it all started twenty-something episodes ago on the first-ever #NWAPowerrr.
Nursing his Super Mongrovian Spiked neck, Nick pleads with Tim to take it easy on him. In fact, Nick can be overheard offering Tim a future shot at Sweet Charlotte if Tim will just eliminate himself and end this whole thing. Nick sweetens the deal by offering to split the winner's purse with Tim, and Nick even promises to donate his half to a charity of Tim's choice. But Tim isn't buying any of it.
Tim lunges at Nick, and they lock up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Overpowering the champ, Tim drives Nick backwards into the corner and then hurls him back out across the ring with a massive beal. Stu asks if Tim could be the long-lost third Steiner brother, as Tim hits a gutwrench suplex and then a double underhook suplex on Nick.
Nick staggers to his feet and swings wildly at Tim with a big right hand. Tim blocks the punch, and then proceeds to do his best Hulk Hogan impression with three big rights right to Nick's noggin. Tim whips the dazed Dealer into the ropes and catches him on the rebound with a big boot, which sends Nick staggering backward into the ropes. Tim lunges after Nick and connects with a clothesline, knocking Nick over the top rope and out to the floor.
Elimination #29: Nick Aldis by Tim StormMama's Baby Boy has done it! He's made history by becoming the first-ever PowerrrRumble winner and doing so in epic fashion by last eliminating the NWA World Heavyweight Champion! Go, Tim, go!
Winner: Tim StormKamille stares at Tim from ringside after the match, but she doesn't make a move. I guess she knows better than to challenge Tim? That is, unless she wants to taste another one of his rock solid clotheslines. Anyway...
Sean Mooney comes down to the ring for a post-match interview with Tim.
Mooney asks how it feels to be the first-ever PowerrrRumble winner, and Tim says it feels great. Tim says he's not sure whether or not he'll compete in another PowerrrRumble, but he looks forward to wrestling in WrestleSystem's tournament at the end of the Iron Gauntlet Series. Tim would love to make history again by becoming the first-ever Grand Slam Iron Champion!
Mooney then announces Tim is donating the entire winner's purse to a charity near and dear to his heart: Teach for America. Tim cuts a mini promo about Teach for America and why the charity is so near and dear to his heart. He then thanks Mama Storm and the fans for all their love and support.
Galli & Stu recap the whole shebang on commentary and send us out. And that's a wrap!
Winner: Tim StormMost Eliminations: Eli DrakeIron Man: Jax DaneI got burned out there toward the end. Hopefully this isn't just a total hot mess. I might come back at some point and fool around with better formatting. We'll see. Really just wanted to get the first show posted. For more bonus points in the meantime, guess which Royal Rumble this PowerrrRumble is based on!
