The million dollar question....

If a cartoon wasn't created to sell toys does it even count??

🤯 is about to find out all about the toy game.

My nephews are 1 and 2 so I only know about the real shitty baby cartoons. I gave him a Peppa Pig toy and a T-Rex, but he just wants to play with Paw Patrol. Like get that shit outta my face you still crap your pants I ain't even listening to this trash.

Apr 28, 2020 23:51:42 GMT @ness said:

🤯 is about to find out all about the toy game.

My nephews are 1 and 2 so I only know about the real shitty baby cartoons. I gave him a Peppa Pig toy and a T-Rex, but he just wants to play with Paw Patrol. Like get that shit outta my face you still crap your pants I ain't even listening to this trash.

Shit, good point. I should start ebaying all the old school good toys of my youth. Super soakers, nerf, gak, etc.

Apr 28, 2020 23:53:16 GMT 🤯 said:

Apr 28, 2020 23:51:42 GMT @ness said:

🤯 is about to find out all about the toy game.

My nephews are 1 and 2 so I only know about the real shitty baby cartoons. I gave him a Peppa Pig toy and a T-Rex, but he just wants to play with Paw Patrol. Like get that shit outta my face you still crap your pants I ain't even listening to this trash.

Shit, good point. I should start ebaying all the old school good toys of my youth. Super soakers, nerf, gak, etc.

That's exactly what I did after you posted street sharks, started looking up toys on ebay. Debating if I want to buy these old Jurassic Park toys or not.

Action figures was my thing as a kid. Ninja Turtles and losing all the accessories.

Apr 28, 2020 23:12:57 GMT 🤯 said:

I could've sworn Street Sharks was 50% about fighting crime and 50% about roller hockey or at least rollerblading, and yet I just rewatched the intro and there's only a split second of rollerblading and it's a totally pointless scene toward the end. Has my memory betrayed me yet again!?

You're thinking of Mighty Ducks.

Apr 28, 2020 23:51:42 GMT @ness said:

🤯 is about to find out all about the toy game.

My nephews are 1 and 2 so I only know about the real shitty baby cartoons. I gave him a Peppa Pig toy and a T-Rex, but he just wants to play with Paw Patrol. Like get that shit outta my face you still crap your pants I ain't even listening to this trash.

Yeah, but Chase is on the case bruh.

But yeah, I've seen more Treehouse shows then I care to admit, between the nephews and niece as well as the girlfriend's kids (at the one birthday party, before social distancing became a thing out here).

Apr 29, 2020 0:05:16 GMT Lony said:

Apr 28, 2020 23:12:57 GMT 🤯 said:

I could've sworn Street Sharks was 50% about fighting crime and 50% about roller hockey or at least rollerblading, and yet I just rewatched the intro and there's only a split second of rollerblading and it's a totally pointless scene toward the end. Has my memory betrayed me yet again!?

You're thinking of Mighty Ducks.

Fuuuck, I forgot all about Mighty Ducks! I loved that shit. But wasn't that ice hockey, not roller hockey?

Apr 29, 2020 0:08:44 GMT 🤯 said:

Apr 29, 2020 0:05:16 GMT Lony said:

You're thinking of Mighty Ducks.

Fuuuck, I forgot all about Mighty Ducks! I loved that shit. But wasn't that ice hockey, not roller hockey?

Yeah, but ice hockey, roller hockey... maybe you're just misremembering.

If not that, then I don't know what you could be talking about.

TIL they made a Mighty Ducks cartoon. Speaking of ducks....
===============================

Duck Tales (woo woo)

A member of my cartoon Mt. Rushmore. Could even be #2 depending on what kind of mood I'm in on any particular given day.

I was all in on Duck Tales from day one. The way I remember it Duck Tales began with this massively hyped made for tv movie. The movie delivered. All the main characters were introduced. Scrooge went through a lot of early character development. The story was cool. El Capitan would always be my choice for the show's greatest villain. I was hooked. Duck Tales was my #1 dime...err...cartoon for many years. 

I mentioned the importance of a great theme in a previous post and Big Pete finished my thought by explaining what exactly constituted a great theme. Duck Tales (like most of my favorite cartoons tbh) had a great theme. As a devotee of Ludvig Borga, I shall share the Finnish Duck Tales theme. Do not be discouraged if you don't know Finnish. You will still want to watch this.



Duck Tales had a clever way of adapting stories from history, literature, mythology, movies, etc. into their show (always with duck based puns, of course). I can't even tell you how many times in later years I would be reading a book, or watching a movie, and start thinking to myself "It's just like that episode of Duck Tales!" 

Favorite Character(s)- Well, you have to start all the way at the top with the duck, the myth, the legend: Scrooge f'n McDuck. He was the richest duck in the world. He had an awesome Scottish accent. He dove into his money bin and swam around in it. Absolute legend.

But most of the characters ruled. In lesser hands Launchpad McQuack could easily have become extremely annoying. But the Duck Tales writers always kept him from jumping the shark. Launchpad ruled. A true hero. Not like that COWARDLY FRAUD Courage of the Cosmos. Gyro Gearloose as a rare babyface mad scientist was another favorite. Duckworth! GOAT level butler. Doofus? Also the man duck. My brother didn't have much time for Webby, but she was alright in my book. Sweetness is underrated. And then there's the aforementioned El Capitan. Check this out. El Capitan was over 400 years old. He lived that long on sheer determination to find this treasure. See, he had this thing called "Gold Fever" (which I'm pretty sure I thought was a real thing) that kept him alive for centuries. You might not like him, but you gotta respect that level of determination. El Capitan was one committed old wheezer. Flintheart and Magica were also decent villains. 

Occasional Misses- I'll admit I never cared much for the Beagle Boys. Their episodes were always pretty blah imo.
-Duck Tales also jumped the shark twice when introducing new characters. First came Bubba Duck. He was the worst. They literally made a song about how cool he was. When I first saw the classic Simpsons episode with Poochie I thought it was a direct parody of Bubba Duck. But they either sent him back to his home planet time, or significantly downgraded his screen time. So at least they were aware of how annoying this "cool" cave duck was.
-Then came Gizmo Duck- the crime fighting alter ego of mild mannered accountant Fenton Crackshell. Fenton wasn't the greatest character to begin with (his mother's storylines being especially brutal) but Gizmo Duck was far worse.
-Much like old school tag teams, I never bothered to learn the difference between Huey, Dewey, and Louie. I also thought they shared a hive mind. My brother did manage to learn who was who and swore they all had different personalities. I'll just have to take his word for it.
-Donald Duck was annoying with his stupid voice. He also wasn't on very often.

Most Memorable Episodes- lol. How long you got? Let's see....

-The opening 5 parter with El Capitan.
-The one where they go to Scotland. Features the world's greatest salesduck, Shakespearean "ghost" actors, druids, a ghost dog, and "Old McDuck he lied and he cheated and he ran amok." OK. This has to be the GOAT Duck Tales episode. Cramming that much goodness into a mere 22 minutes should be illegal.
-The Duckworth episode where he coaches the boys baseball team and saves the day. All in a day's work for the World's Greatest Butler (all apologies to Geoffrey, Hudson, and Carson).
-The episode where Magica casts a spell which sends Scrooge to a future where his nephews are massive jerks. One of the "darkest" episodes for sure.
-Superdoo! This was my favorite as a kid. Dorky Doofus finds a "magic donut." Gains super powers. Learns valuable life lessons.
-The one where Launchpad is proven to be a true hero while Major Courage of the Cosmos is revealed to be a phony.
-The one with the Conquistador and the Fountain of Youth. Probably my #2 as a kid.
-The one where they go to the Bermuda Triangle. Cool explanation for what's going on there too.
-The Duck In The Iron Mask featuring Roy & Ray.
-The one where they go to Australia and have to deal with those pesky Willy-Wisps.
-The flashback episode(s?) with Scrooge and his one true (non-monetary) love- Glittering Goldie.
-The lemmings are coming! The lemmings are coming!
-The one with the roly poly underground earthquake guys. Speaking of them...

Other- As if that's not enough, Duck Tales also had a top tier NES game. Extremely easy, but still great. Excellent music as well.
There was an actual Duck Tales movies in theaters at some point. I remember seeing it in the theater because of course I did. I think it was sort of an Aladdin knockoff? And they later replayed the movie in the regular Duck Tales tv slot as a 5 part mini-series. The villain was called Morlock and his incompetent lackey was named Dijon. I think Dijon had a face turn.

Many years after Duck Tales' prime I took 8 am-Noon classes M-W-F my first semester or two of college like an idiot. But that did give me a few hours in between school and work. My regular routine was to come home, eat lunch, and watch the killer lineup of Duck Tales-Boy Meets World.....in college. I also rewatched a bunch of episodes about 5 years ago with my brother. Duck Tales holds up like the classic it is. 

Duck Tales was likely my favorite cartoon, if not my favorite show period, from 1987-1989. Chances are it blew all other cartoons out of the water. Until a new contender finally emerged in 1990.....

But that's a story for later.

I love you Baker-man. Duck Tales was one of my top jams. That post takes me way back.

Also, I guess my memory jogging phase now is just rewatching show intros...

Just rewatched Gobots:


They were such the poor man's Transformers, LOL... But fuck me if I didn't love them all the same!

Leader One definitely gives Optimus Prime and Leonardo a run for their money as best "leader of a group" name.

I don't appreciate Optimus Prime and Megatron breaking kayfabe by having Starbucks together, but do get a kick out of the Transformers and Gobots interaction!



Hang around until the end for a Johnny 5 cameo!

Of all the Disney shows, Duck Tales was my favourite. It aced the theme song test, the characters were pitch perfect and for a cartoon of that era the animation was top notch. Furthermore, the show had some continuity which was rare for a cartoon and you had to pay attention to theme song just to see where the show was at. I was completely fine with Bubba since after his debut all he really did was protect the base, Gizmo on the other hand offended me. Not only did he take over the show, but he was a parody of my hero and the greatest babyface in WCW history - Robocop. Gizmo was like a cheat code and to make matters worse he made his way into DT's successor Darkwing Duck.

I must have caught the pilot 10 years after it debuted and never in it's entirety. The only episodes I remember outside of the debuts were:
- The two parter with the golden goose where everything the goose touches turns to gold. It was one of those episodes that started great but got even better as the goose attempts to turn the entire world gold and just about succeeds in doing so.

- The episode that was a take on Shakespeare where Scrooge goes to this 'haunted' castle but it's actually inhabited by radical method actors or some such.

I definitely watched my fair share and remember seeing a fair amount of Magica (formerly known as 'that witch duck') but it's been 20 odd years. I definitely caught the movie since it came on during a family holiday and was followed by some other Rip Taylor film right after. I really enjoyed his vocal performance in that movie, he was like Dom Delouise who always added to every Don Bluth movie.

I was going to suggest Mighty Ducks as well. I don't think the Street Sharks had day jobs, they were just four guys minding their business when that evil doctor guy turned them into humanoid sharks because that's what mad scientists do.

Both shows were basically the same thing, and both drew dollars and cents from me. I think I still have the lead protaganist guy floating around in storage.

Apr 29, 2020 2:50:36 GMT 🤯 said:

I love you Baker-man. Duck Tales was one of my top jams. That post takes me way back.

Also, I guess my memory jogging phase now is just rewatching show intros...

Just rewatched Gobots:


They were such the poor man's Transformers, LOL... But fuck me if I didn't love them all the same!

Leader One definitely gives Optimus Prime and Leonardo a run for their money as best "leader of a group" name.

Not that it really matters but Gobots came out in 83, Transformers in 84.

Also well mostly unrelated, there is a docu series on Netflix called The Toys That Made Us. Given the context of this thread, I would recommend the TMNT, GI Joe, He-Man and Transformers episodes. Outside of those episodes (toylines with cartoons), maybe even check out the Power Rangers and Wrestljng Figure episodes as well (Baker, would probably love that episode).

Apr 29, 2020 13:29:09 GMT Lony said:

Apr 29, 2020 2:50:36 GMT 🤯 said:

I love you Baker-man. Duck Tales was one of my top jams. That post takes me way back.

Also, I guess my memory jogging phase now is just rewatching show intros...

Just rewatched Gobots:


They were such the poor man's Transformers, LOL... But fuck me if I didn't love them all the same!

Leader One definitely gives Optimus Prime and Leonardo a run for their money as best "leader of a group" name.

Not that it really matters but Gobots came out in 83, Transformers in 84.

Also well mostly unrelated, there is a docu series on Netflix called The Toys That Made Us. Given the context of this thread, I would recommend the TMNT, GI Joe, He-Man and Transformers episodes. Outside of those episodes (toylines with cartoons), maybe even check out the Power Rangers and Wrestljng Figure episodes as well (Baker, would probably love that episode).

After re-watching the Gobots intro, I stumbled onto a 14-minute video detailing the Gobots history and rivalry with Transformers. My mind was blown to learn Gobots was actually the first to market. Guess just goes to show quality wins in the long run? Better made toys, better made movies/TV shows, better marketing, better character names/designs, better catchier catchphrases, etc.

I definitely want to check out the Toys That Made Us Series.

Apr 29, 2020 2:11:27 GMT Baker said:

-The one where they go to Scotland. Features the world's greatest salesduck, Shakespearean "ghost" actors, druids, a ghost dog, and "Old McDuck he lied and he cheated and he ran amok." OK. This has to be the GOAT Duck Tales episode. Cramming that much goodness into a mere 22 minutes should be illegal.

Turns out this episode was too good to be true. I mashed up two separate "Shakespeare" episodes in my head. One being the episode Big Pete awesomely described as having "radical method actors" while the other featured the world's greatest salesduck and the "Old McDuck" play. Both episodes are top notch Duck Tales though. Highly recommended!

I had that Castle Greyskull Pete posted a pic of! It was every bit as cool as it looked on the box. We'd always set up a big Castle Greyskull-themed display during Halloween season incorporating "scary" characters such as Mumm-Ra, while Skeletor naturally occupied the most prominent position on the castle. Good times.

I had no idea Gobots came before Transformers and did not remember the awesomely named Leader One.

============================

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Remember what I said the other day about being a cartoon snob? This is perhaps the ultimate example of what I was referring to. I would never, (Jericho voice) ever, watch a show called Biker Mice From Mars. Same goes for Rude Dog and the Dweebs, which I remember being a favorite of my cousins. Which brings us to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I knew all of those words. But they did not belong together in that order. I immediately dismissed this show as one for dimwitted paste eaters.

Yet it was all the rage among my (obviously paste-eating) peers. The aforementioned Rude Dog cousins had the TMNT NES game at least as early as Christmas season 1989. The other kids in school frequently talked about TMNT. I still remember one early TMNT conversation. The other kids were talking about Ninja Turtles as usual while I sat alone and apart reading some book. I'm guessing this was an indoor recess due to rain? Anyway, one bold kid (Kyle, I think, though don't hold me to that) had the temerity to rouse me from my reading.

"Who is your favorite Ninja Turtle?" he asked.
Now back then I would at least go through the motions of fitting in. So not wanting to come across as a TOTAL weirdo, I quickly gathered my wits and stammered out an answer.
"Err...the...umm blue one?" 

Kyle(?)- "Leonardo, huh? Well, I prefer Michelangelo. But Leonardo is cool too. He does lead, after all."

Whew! I had dodged a bullet. And promptly went back to reading my Henry Huggins or baseball (I forget which) book, having kept up appearances for the time being. 

Time marched on. My best friend during the 89-90 school year was a kid named Phil(ippe). We got in the habit of exchanging weekend visits. One Saturday he would visit my house. The next I would visit his. This particular Saturday I was told to bring some money because we were going to the movie theater. But the movie itself was a surprise. Yet Phil guaranteed I was going to love it. I finally get to Phil's and find out we are going to see the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie that just came out. "NO! I hate the stupid Ninja Turtles!" I thought to myself. But, again, I at least went through the motions of fitting in. "Cool" I half-heartedly muttered. Before going to the theater I remember playing this Mario Brothers game on his Gameboy. It had an Egyptian level. Anybody know what I'm talking about?

Anyway, I trusted Phil completely. He was a good dude. So I finally spilled the beans. "Phil, I have a confession to make. I have never watched a single episode of Ninja Turtles. I always thought it looked stupid." Phil was shocked by this unexpected turn of events. I might as well have said I was a Transformer. But he was a calm and understanding sort. So he spent the next few minutes talking entirely too fast in order to explain the characters and plot of Ninja Turtles. Finally the time had arrived. Phil's doctor father drove us to the movie theater.

Wonder of wonders, I actually liked the movie. Raphael's storyline carried it for me. The movie theater (myself included) collectively gasped when Super Shredder made an appearance towards the end. Little did I know then that I would see much more of the man behind the mask, Kevin Nash, in the years to come. 

The movie (and Phil) turned me into an instant Ninja Turtles fanatic. I was soooo hyped to watch the cartoon that coming Monday. It's all I thought about for the next 2 days. My brother was also thrilled by this turn of events. See, we shared the TV. Usually we agreed on what to watch. But he had always wanted to watch TMNT while I insisted upon watching some other show (Alvin and the Chipmunks perhaps?). Now we were finally on the same page. I couldn't wait.

I don't remember exactly what that first episode was, but it must have been a good one because I was HOOKED. I lived and breathed Ninja Turtles for the next few months.

Based on the movie's release date and a few major life events I can date my TMNT fandom fairly accurately. It didn't last long. Possibly only 2 months, and almost certainly no longer than 5 months. But I was ALL IN for those few months. I also went on a major TMNT toy binge. The cool thing about this is I would see toys advertised on the back of the toy boxes that I still hadn't seen on tv. So it just built more anticipation for these characters. Like I wanted to see Baxter Stockman (for example) so bad. 

Oh, back to Phil and more cartoon snobbery real quick. The Simpsons was the other big thing in kiddie pop culture at the time. I hated The Simpsons too! It wasn't "sophisticated" enough for me. Instead of The Simpsons, I watched some (completely not) "sophisticated" show called Father Dowling Mysteries about a priest who solved crimes   Turns out The Simpsons was much more "sophisticated" and infinitely better than Father Dowling. Anyway, Phil also got me hooked on The Simpsons when he told me about the episode where Krusty gets framed and Bart frees him based on his shoe size. Phil made it sound amazing and it got me interested in "the stupid" Simpsons for the first time. The rest is history.

Phil was a good dude. I haven't seen or heard from him since 1990 or 91. But I did look him up a year or two ago like some kind of stalker. He lived in Chicago at the time. Hope the cartoon connoisseur is doing well. This dude introduced me to TMNT and The Simpsons. What a legend.

Anyway, back to TMNT. It passed the all important theme test with flying colors....



Most Memorable Episodes- I honestly don't remember any particular episodes. But Rat King & Leatherhead were my favorite characters. So any time they made a rare appearance was bound to capture my attention even more than usual.

Favorite Characters- See above. From what I remember, Rat King was the darkest and most interesting TMNT villain. He was an enemy of both the Turtles and Shredder (from what I remember) who had his own agenda. This made him interesting. Leatherhead was just this cool, big ass alligator who said "I guarantee" in an awesome Cajun accent. Look, I had this weird thing for Cajuns growing up....probably because of Leatherhead, now that I think about it. Phil's favorite character was this badass samurai black rabbit. I don't remember this character's name, but he was probably my 3rd favorite. That dude ruled.
EDIT: Can't believe I forgot about Casey Jones! Shame on me. He also ruled. Had a great look with the hockey goaltender mask. Also had a cool character as the "edgy" babyface vigilante. His voice was also right up there with Leatherhead's iconic "I Guarantee" line as the most imitated on the school playground.

Other Characters- Splinter was cool. Shredder & Krang were ok cartoon villains. They bickered a bit too much for my liking. I'm over here like JUST FOCUS ON BEATING THE TURTLES, DUDES! Eyes on the prize, people.

As for the turtles, Donatello was my favorite. Then Leonardo. Raphael was a mixed bag. He was cool (good) but rude (bad). And Michelangelo sucked. Couldn't stand him. He was basically what I thought the show would be like in my "snob" days. Michelangelo was their Bubba Duck....pretty much Poochie before Poochie was even a thing. 

Rocksteady & Bebop were like villain versions of Michelangelo. Awful. The worst. Poster boys for ineffective cartoon henchmen. Look, I'll admit my vision for cartoons even as a child was some super dark George RR Martin "everybody dies!" shit.   Not because I was a young psychopath (at least I hope not!) but because I thought it would have made for better drama/storytelling if the bad guys won from time to time. Silly comedic villains (or heroes) just did not appeal to me.

Other Random Stuff- I watched a few episodes with my brother a couple years back (which will be a recurring theme in this series). One cool storyline I didn't remember was a few of April O'Neill's Channel 6 coworkers being anti-Turtle propagandists. I also didn't remember April's other coworker, who was basically the TMNT version of Janine from Ghostbusters. 

Like I said, TMNT burned bright for a short time. I lost interest pretty quickly. Or perhaps we lost the TMNT channel when we moved....like 5 miles away.  I also  remember being SHOCKED a few years later when flipping through the channels one day and discovering TMNT was STILL on. The original series lasted 9 Years! That's incredibly long for a cartoon series from this era.

We went on a field trip to the Baltimore Museum of Art late in the 89-90 school year. Aside from the GOAT Bob Ross, I have never really cared about art before or since. But I remember being HYPED for this field trip just on the off chance they would have a Michaelangelo, Raphael, Leonardo, or Donatello in this museum. And I don't think I was alone among my TMNT loving class. As best I can remember, no Ninja Turtles were represented in the obviously mediocre Baltimore Museum of Art. Sad.

Final Thoughts- Was my absolute favorite cartoon for 2-5 months. Cool toys. Was a veritable media franchise. THE thing in kiddie culture circa 1990. Would have a shot at cracking my Top 10 Favorite Cartoon list and be a lock for the Top 15. 
==========================
Next Time: Hopefully Alvin and the Chipmunks, The REAL Ghostbusters, and The Jetsons all in one fell swoop. I'm going to try!

I had to pause reading and will need to go back to finish, but needed to say... Yes, I know what you're talking about! That was a terrifying level from Super Mario 3! Had quick sand and pyramids and shit. Hated that world/level.

I'm loving the hell out of these write ups Baker, looking forward to your next post.

Apr 30, 2020 2:46:26 GMT Lony said:

I'm loving the hell out of these write ups Baker, looking forward to your next post.

Ditto. Especially this latest TMNT one. Legend has it from my mom that TMNT was by far and away #1 w/ a bullet favorite as a kid. Even over what I assumed were my absolute favorite, the Transformers. Reading this was a blast. I think my Turtle order went: Raphael, Leonardo, Michaelangelo, Donatello... With increasing gaps between each. Also, huge Carmen San Diego level crush on April apparently. Also, blame TMNT for my unabashed love of pizza which holds to this day.

Also, I feel like I had a moment like you had with Phil. Think my guy's name was Luke. He was literally a third grade version of Loose Canon Brian Pillman. Way too cool, way ahead of his time. Instead of TMNT though, it was Predator and Alien and Terminator that we bonded over with me faking it until making it. Instead of Mario in Egypt, I played the Predator video game (on Sega?) at his place.

Thanks for the feedback, guys. It helps keep me motivated. Just wait until I get to the 1-2 punch of Conan and the GOAT Exosquad. If you think these posts are long now...

I forgot about Casey Jones! Shame on me. So I added a little blurb on TMNT's greatest hockey masked vigilante.

🤯 I share your love of pizza. Only I don't think my lifelong pizza love has anything to do with the Turtles lol. 

My "Luke" was a guy named Brian. Predator was the first uncut R Rated movie I ever saw. I watched it at his house during his sleepover birthday party. Probably during that very 89-90 school year. He was honestly kind of a jerk. One of the Rude Dog cousins caught him trying to steal my baseball cards one time and my mom would never let him come over again after that. Even in his "prime" he was sort of that "friend" you don't really like   Phil was waaay cooler. 

Also, this thread title reminds me of the great Darryl Dawkins....

So has anyone mentioned that Beast Wars is the best Transformers cartoon ever yet?

Apr 30, 2020 3:52:55 GMT RagnarokMike said:

So has anyone mentioned that Beast Wars is the best Transformers cartoon ever yet?

Not the best, but close to it with a very small gap. I fucking loved the fuck out of Beast Wars. Like Transformers and Toy Story and furry sex.

The B+ Players

The following are 3 top of the bottom/bottom of the top cartoons I watched regularly in the late 80s-1990 but don't remember many particular episodes.

The Jetsons- I mentioned being lukewarm towards The Flintstones. Yet for some reason I loved their futuristic counterpart The Jetsons. We kick things off with an economical theme which introduces the 4 main characters comprising the Jetson family using only 11 words. 



The Jetsons was basically suburban life in the second half of 20th Century America transported to the future. The main character was everyman George Jetson. Jane was his wife. His boy was Elroy and daughter, Judy. They also had a dog named Astro and a maid named Rosie.

George worked for Mr. Spacely of Spacely Sprockets. Mr. Spacely was the most memorable character. He was like 2 feet tall, mustachioed, and a hot headed jerk. Spacely Sprockets feuded with another company called Cogswell Cogs. Mr. Cogswell seemed nicer than Spacely but it was mostly a front from what I remember. Anyway, as a kid I always thought George would have been better off working for Cogswell. 

I watched a few Jetsons episodes at some point in....the late 2000s maybe? Because I realized a lot of the jokes would have went over my head as a kid. A running gag was George only worked something two one hour shifts per week yet was always complaining about his "back breaking job."

My friend Bryan (the DBZ Guy) and I always used to joke about how people from the 60s would be sooo disappointed in early 21st Century America due to our lack of flying cars, 2 hour work weeks, and everybody wearing silver jump suits. The Jetsons basically shaped what the future was supposed to look like to kiddie me.

The only episodes I kinda sorta remember are the one where Daughter Judy is obsessed with this teen idol guy and the one(?) where George goes to work for Cogswell. There was also a big Jetsons Meet The Flintstones crossover that got a lot of hype.

I loved me some Jetsons. It may have even been my favorite cartoon for a little while in between Duck Tales and TMNT. It was either the Jetsons or....

Alvin and the Chipmunks



This show revolved around the daily lives of singing chipmunks- Alvin, Simon, and Theodore. Regular adult male Dave Seville served as their father figure. Alvin was the star of the show. Just ask him if you don't believe me. Alvin was a cocky face in the style of Zack Morris or Peter Pan. He was honestly kind of a jerk. From what I remember, most episode involved Alvin getting the gang in trouble and/or having to learn a life lesson. Simon was their bespectacled genius. Theodore liked to eat.

They also had female counterparts called the Chipettes- Brittany was their "Alvin", Jeanette their "Simon" and Eleanor was....actually nothing like Theodore, but they were always paired together. 

Eleanor & Theodore were my favorite characters. I even renamed two of my stuffed animals after them! My TMNT-loving classmates used to taunt me by singing a parody version of the Chipmunks song that went "Alvin, Simon, Theodork." I'd get so upset!   I guess Ninja Turtles vs. Chipmunks was a playground cartoon feud?? 

The only episodes I have vague memories of....are Alvin getting amnesia and thinking he's Michael Jackson? Wait. That can't be right. It sounds way too much like the classic Leon Kompowsky Simpsons episode. But...I think Michael Jackson was on one time? And Alvin probably did have amnesia another time. I also remember first hearing the Billy Joel classic For The Longest Time on the Chipmunks. When I first heard the "real" version years later I was like "That's from Alvin and the Chipmunks!"

Anyway, I loved Alvin and the Chipmunks for a while there. It was right up there with The Jetsons as a gap bridger between Duck Tales and TMNT. Alvin aired on DC Fox 5 right before the infamous Small Wonder. That was the likely the best TV block of its era. And Small Wonder ruled! I will hear no arguments. Pretty sure I eventually dumped Alvin and the lads for TMNT. Shame on me?
=================================
Something came up and I must go now. Still have one more B+ player from this era that I'll have to cover later. 

The REAL Ghostbusters

Rounding out the B+ players of the late 80s we kick things off with Ray Parker Jr's iconic Ghostbusters theme...



But before we get to the cartoon we must go back even further for a patented Storytime~!

Ghostbusters, the movie, came out in theaters when I was very young. I did not watch it then. In part because I thought it was a scary movie strictly for teenagers and grown ups, not for kids.

Fast forward a few years. I visited my grandparents house with my own parents and brother. My grandfather rented a movie that night. That movie was Ghostbusters. This was weird on multiple levels...

My grandfather was never a jerk to me, but he was a stern man who fought in World War II, and was also a retired police officer. I mention this only to set the stage. For my grandfather was a stereotypical ex-military man/ex-cop type. By the time I was born, he was a morbidly obese fellow who rarely ever left his chair conveniently situated by the fridge in his kitchen. Many years later I would discover my own father did not care for his. In fact, my own father fought in Vietnam just to get away from his old man. I had also only ever known my grandfather to watch two things- Westerns and The Three Stooges. So the fact that he rented a movie which was neither of those things was super shocking to kiddie me.

One more quick grandpop story before I move on.....My brother and I told our friends he had been a pro wrestler. This was a blatant lie. Now my grandfather certainly had the look of a pro wrestler with his crew cut and big gut. But he was not, and had never been, a pro wrestler. One day these friends decided to call our bluff by directly asking my grandfather if he had ever been a pro wrestler. Uh oh! We were about to be exposed as the fraudsters we undoubtedly were. However, to our astonishment, my grandfather said he had been a wrestler! He claimed to have wrestled as "Spike Jones" and used the bodyslam as a finisher. I had never known my grandfather to even watch wrestling. But maybe he heard us discussing his "career" and decided to play along so as not to have his grandchildren look like a bunch of chumps?

Anyway, so I'm at my grandparents house watching "the scary" Ghostbusters. And I was right! This movie was terrifying! I tapped out on the scene where Dana Barrett opens her refrigerator door and reveals a portal to Zuul's world. That's it. I'm out. I walked into my grandparents bed in the next room, hid my face in the pillows, and covered my ears as best I could until that wretched movie was over. For YEARS I was afraid to open my own fridge too early in the morning, or especially too late at night, lest I too inadvertently stumble upon a portal to Zuul's crazy world.



Terrifying!

Some time after that traumatic experience I went to the birthday party of a school friend named Matt (doing all these old Storytimes makes me realize Matt & Brian/Bryan were extremely overused names when I was growing up). After cake and some games we sat down to watch Matt's favorite movie...

Ghostbusters! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! "Be brave. Be brave. Be brave."- the internal monologue of late 80s Baker. I was surrounded by a dozen kids and a handful of parents. I could do this! Somehow, some way, I did manage to make it through the fridge scene (probably by closing my eyes) and was actually starting to enjoy the movie when my parents arrived to pick me up. Whew! I had dodged a bullet. And this Ghostbusters wasn't half bad.....

I think that's when I started watching the cartoon. And probably not long after that I watched the proper movie, from start to finish this time. Third time's a charm! Ghostbusters ruled! It was more comedy than horror. I had been a silly kid this whole time. OK, so I still did close my eyes during the fridge scene. But the rest of the movie was a stone cold classic. I came around enough on Ghostbusters to see the (highly underrated) sequel in the theater along with the Rude Dog cousins, another Matt, and some mom's.

So! The cartoon at last. Let's do this....

Favorite Characters- The great thing about Ghostbusters is all 4 of the main characters rule in their own way. They all do a great job of filling their respective roles. My favorite in the cartoon was Ray because he was the "nicest." But cartoon Egon's physics-defying hair deserves a special mention. My brother and I called it "The Swoop." And it was glorious. There was a late 90s WWF game for Playstation(?) where you could give your CAWs an Egon Swoop! I spammed the hell out of that hairstyle. I'll admit I didn't care much for Peter in those days. He was a jerk! Nowadays Peter is my favorite. I also remember being annoyed by cartoon Louis and especially cartoon Janine.

Favorite Villain- Samhain. Absolute legend. The original Pumpkinhead would just chill off by himself in the containment unit and you just KNEW he was up to bad news. Clever name, too. His episodes were always the ones I was most interested in. Pretty sure he almost caused the end of the world as we know it at least once.

Most Memorable Episodes- See above. The Samhain episodes. Once again I watched a couple episodes a few years ago with my brother. The one I remember from that run was about another ghost called Boss Pozo. He was like the leader of the Ghost Mafia.

Neat Twist- I liked how they frequently showed the inside of the containment unit. It gave these ghosts life after (second) death. The way I remember it a surprisingly high number of episodes had to deal with going into the containment unit, or ghosts escaping from said containment unit. I also get the impression that rascal Samhain was responsible for most of these containment unit issues.

Jumping The Shark- Slimer. F'n Slimer. The worst. It wasn't too bad in the beginning when he was just silly comic relief. I even remember one episode where the ballsy little bugger went into the dreaded containment unit! Think about that for a second. Slimer is basically a traitor to his own kind. Yet he had the balls to boldly walk into basically Ghost Prison where all inmates hate his guts. He did this for the greater good. That took some real courage. So there was at least one good Slimer-centric episode.

But then Slimer became featured more and more. Entire episodes revolved around him. Then he got his own mini-episodes. Then I think his own maxi-episodes? It became entirely too much. Slimer was the worst character on the show and now he was being shoved down my throat. I tapped out pretty soon after it turned into The Slimer Show.

BUT! The Slimer Show did feature a blue dog named Ferdinand. This is only notable because I once tricked a cousin into thinking I had an invisible blue dog named Ferdinand on the end of this leash I used to carry around. Yes. That's right. I used to just walk around with a leash that had no (visible) dog on the end. I was one weird kid. But that's not even the craziest part! That would be the fact that this cousin (the sister of the more famous Wrestling Cousin) STILL brings up my invisible blue dog just about every time I see her! 

Next Time: I hope to quickly (lol yeah right) knock out a bunch of lesser cartoons I watched during this late 80s-early 90s era.

Holy shit, Baker crushing me with nostalgia waves.

Still need to catch up on and finish the latest Ghostbusters post, but his B Squad is reminding me of more cartoons I loved but have apparently forgotten my love.

I was so all in on Jetsons. Want to come back to elaborate more, but now need to reread that section.

Meanwhile, I think I more respected Chipmunks than I was actively into them. Think they were definitely more of a preferred bridge gap program over lesser but similarly "cute" shows like Smurfs or Looney Tunes. Love the Zack Morris analogy for Alvin. So spot on.

Ghostbusters, still need to read, but I recall this... Don't know what order they came out, cartoon first or movie first, but I saw the movie second. And was super disappointed. Could not compete. That said, I also preferred Ghostbusters 2 over the original as a kid, so maybe I just had a bizarre gauge?

Could never get into the Ghostbusters, in any capacity. I still got a slimer in my back window of my car despite that. A former sugar baby of mine said I wasn't allowed to do that if I've never seen it though.

My favorite thing about Slimer was Hi-C juice boxes.

Apr 30, 2020 21:46:48 GMT 🤯 said:

My favorite thing about Slimer was Hi-C juice boxes.

ECTO COOLER.

There are so many things that I'm a fan of just based on the merchandise.

Baker-man, I really dig the personal anecdote about Grandpap and Father Bake. Thank you to them both for their service.

It's crazy to think about father-son relationships and the actions they can motivate. I can't imagine hating my dad so much I'd volunteer to go to war as a better alternative to being around him. In fact, I dealt with the opposite:

9/11 happened at the start of my freshman year of high school. I was young enough for it to be traumatizing enough that I wanted to race out and volunteer for the infantry to go get a little firsthand payback. Against who? I had no idea. Didn't matter. I was feeling like those kiddos did in December 1941.

But my parents wouldn't sign off on the idea, meaning I'd have to wait until I was 17 or 18 or however old. In those interim years, during garage haircuts, I'd lay out my big ballsy plans to my Vietnam vet dad.

He was thereallt in the realest sense, a 1LT for infantry platoons in the Big Red One and First Cavalry divisions. Whatever experience he had in the suck rocked him enough he'd never talk about anything in detail. And when he would talk, you'd get hints of insane shit... But then he'd say he doesn't remember, that he must've blacked it out. To this day, I've only gotten blips of how he apparently excelled at setting ambushes and how the one time a fire base he was at got overrun (apparently Platoon portrayed a similar scene very well based on his experience).

ANYWAY... He'd always listen to young me patiently while buzzing my head, letting me vent all my patriotic aggression verbally, then calmly retort war isn't all that fun, and if I was ever to join I have to get a college degree first so I'd go the OCS route. Based on his experience, he pitched it as better to be the one making decisions and giving orders than taking them from some young idiot. While I'm sure he believes that, I think it also was a way to buy a few more years once high school was over.

Then, at some point along the way, We Were Soldiers Once... And Young was published. Or maybe it already had been, but the movie release got my dad to read the book. Apparently it hit very close to home. I remember him being put to bed early after getting too drunk at a dinner party he and my mom were hosting. It must've been like 8pm or so because I was still up and wide awake doing whatever on the computer in my room, and remember it being weird he was going to bed so early.

Then I heard him sobbing from my parents room. I was confused as fuck because my dad never cried/cries. More out of confusion over what the sound was than anything else, I venture across the hall. Through the darkness, I check on my tucked-in crying dad. I was super confused and now concerned. Like I was in a bizarro world where no one acts like they normally do. It was about when I noticed We Were Soldiers on his nightstand when he lurched up, grabbed me, and started begging me through tears to promise him to never go to war. He didn't want anything to happen to me, he didn't want me to see the things he's seen, or do the things he's done.

WOOF.

We've never addressed that night, and I have no idea if he even remembers it. But it still haunts me to this day.

Not knowing moderation back then either, I interpreted his begging wishes as "please don't even join the military". So I never did. And probably good that I didn't, because I would've literally been ride or die and would've wanted to follow in my dad's footsteps by going infantry to fight the actual fight.

Man, now I forget where I was even going with this.

I hate that I can't really talk to my dad about this stuff. Those walls are still up. He wants to protect me. From the things he's seen and done. I just want him to know it's OK, that he's not a monster, that he's my hero not because of what he did or didn't do over there... But because he did whatever had to be done, came back, led a normal life, raised kids as a good father, as a consistently steady example of what a good man -a man's man- should aspire to be.

That's my biggest regret now about not serving then. Had I served, and faced combat, and survived... And he'd survived the anxiety of me doing all that... Then maybe he'd feel a little more comfortable opening up and letting it all out with me.

🤯 has been telling me he turned left to my right, never understanding the context. Of course the story gets made public in a thread about dragon balls. What a world.

Apr 30, 2020 22:13:20 GMT @ness said:

🤯 has been telling me he turned left to my right, never understanding the context. Of course the story gets made public in a thread about dragon balls. What a world.

You'll always be my spiritual Siamese twin!