From parents to teachers all the way to cops, have you ever heard this phrase and it ever actually been true?

Feels like that every time I get a DM from a PW Moderator...

I use this one at work now when I ask to schedule a meeting with a subordinate (or a subordinate’s subordinate). Some of those chats don’t necessarily have an agenda, I just need to check in on one or two things and want to get it on my schedule.

Jul 5, 2024 17:58:06 GMT mikec said:

I use this one at work now when I ask to schedule a meeting with a subordinate (or a subordinate’s subordinate). Some of those chats don’t necessarily have an agenda, I just need to check in on one or two things and want to get it on my schedule.

I just circumvent this by going in and saying 'what did I do?'

I used this a couple times with my kid to open up a dialogue about things much like mikec mentioned with his team members. I also used the 'you'll get in more trouble for lying about something than telling me the truth' or 'you'll never get in trouble from me for standing up for yourself or someone else (as long as you aren't being the asshole) just be sure your ass can cash the cheque that your mouth is writing.' That happened a couple of times when she was taken to the office for getting in to a fight (verbal and physical) standing up to a bunch of kids picking on another kid for being different.  I once met the father of one of those kids who was super appreciative that my daughter got involved because he said it broke his heart when he saw how kids treated his son because he had an intellectual disability. I told him those other kids were the ones with the disability.  I have always tried to stand by what I said, but I don't know if I was always successful, but my kid tells me I was and that she is going to implement a lot of the things I did with her own kids.  

I absolutely use it with my kids and my direct reports.

The distinction between being corrected and being “in trouble” is punishment or consequences.

I correct behavior with my kids (and frame it as “coach” or “advise” for my team members), but in those situations, there’s no “trouble,” so I’ll use this phrase to set the tone.

mikec & KJ sound like managers I would want to work for. My manager uses the phrase 'just checking in'. Or more recently 'just checking in to make sure you're alive'.