This project will answer the question "what would a Baker fanfic have looked like if PW existed in 1992?" It will be strongly influenced by my 92-95 action figure league with a dash of earlier leagues thrown in for additional lore. You can read about it all here beginning with the "Early Days: Summer 1988-June 1990" post pwcom.proboards.com/thread/1485/action-figure-leagues?page=2

It won't be a carbon copy simply because I don't remember EVERYTHING (plus I lost my old notebooks), but I plan on sticking close to the original version as possible for the main event scene. For now I'm sticking with fictional wrestlers, and thinly veiled versions of real wrestlers, but don't be too surprised if a few real ones show up along the way.

rad mentioned my magnum opus New Generation Wrestling the other day. Well, this is basically the original NGW. It's based on how I saw wrestling as a kid... Before I was even the slightest bit smartened up. This is, of course, the best way to view wrestling. This is pre-Attitude Era. Pre-giving a hoot about workrate. The top fan favorites tend to be musclemen, patriots, or best of all patriotic musclemen. The top rulebreakers are usually very tall men, very fat men, very foreign men, or a combination of all three for maximum dimeage. And there are CHARACTERS. So. Many. Characters. Characters all over the place as far as the eye can see. There IS a dearth of girth...for now. It's a really big deal! But that will be explained and corrected as we move on.

If I learned about something cool in school, that's a wrestling figure character. Saw something neat on tv or film- wrestling figure character. Read something interesting in a book- wrestling figure character. Heard a cool song- find a way to incorporate what I heard into my wrestling figure league. Saw a cool wrestler on an actual wrestling show- tweak the name and use a bootleg version to give me more leeway. (kiddie me was weirdly respectful of brand IP)

I have the attention span of a gnat so there's every chance I get bored with this in a few days and don't think about it again for a year, but right now I'm all in. I spent the past 3 nights painstakingly creating the perfect title history! And that's just ONE title history! I have 2 or 3 more to go before I even get to the current stuff! And by "current", of course, I mean 31 years ago. Without further ado, look on ye mighty and despair...

World Championship History

Mr. Wrestling	4/11/63	5/17/63	36 days
Abruzzi Slugger	5/17/63	1/18/71	2803 days
Eighth Wonder of the World	1/8/71	12/1/73	1048 days
Abruzzi Slugger (2)	12/1/73	4/26/76	877 days
Eighth Wonder of the World (2)	4/26/76	6/25/76	60 days
Abruzzi Slugger (3)	6/25/76	4/30/77	309 days
The King	4/30/77	2/10/78	286 days
Bob Boone	2/10/78	2/2/80	722 days
Texecutioner	2/2/80	8/9/80	189 days
Bob Boone (2)	8/9/80	12/26/83	1234 days
The King (2)	12/26/83	1/23/84	28 days
Johnny Freedom	1/23/84	5/6/84	114 days
The King (3)	5/6/84	7/4/84	59 days
Star Spangled Bengal (2*)	7/4/84	7/14/84	10 days
The King (4)	7/14/84	8/15/84	32 days
The Crusader	8/15/84	10/31/84	77 days
Scarecrow	10/31/84	12/25/84	55 days
The Crusader (2)	12/25/84	2/18/85	55 days
The King (5)	2/18/85	3/31/85	41 days
Scarecrow (2)	3/31/85	8/16/85	138 days
G. "Skulls" Skultnick	8/16/85	11/7/85	52 days
The Crusader (3)	11/7/85	1/4/86	58 days
The King [6]	1/4/86	4/7/86	93 days
G. "Skulls" Skultnick (2)	4/7/86	8/28/86	143 days
Bald Chauffeur	8/28/86	3/29/87	213 days
Moon River	3/29/87	2/5/88	313 days
Master of Disaster	2/5/88	4/2/89	422 days
Moon River (2)	4/2/89	1/21/90	294 days
Giant George	1/21/90	3/24/91	427 days
Moon River (3)	3/24/91	11/27/91	248 days
The King (7)	11/27/91	1/19/92	53 days
Lumberjack Jess	1/19/92	----	217 days+

*Star Spangled Bengal was Johnny Freedom under a mask to get around a Loser Leaves Town stipulation in which The King cheated to win. The Bengal was unfortunately stripped of the title after refusing to unmask in accordance with Article 9: Section 10 of the rulebook, causing the Championship to revert back to the odious King.

Most Reigns

7- The King
3- Abruzzi Slugger
3- The Crusader
3- Moon River
2- Eighth Wonder of the World
2- Bob Boone
2- Johnny Freedom/Star Spangled Bengal 
2- Scarecrow
2- G. "Skulls" Skultnick
1- Mr. Wrestling/Texecutioner/Bald Chauffeur/Master of Disaster/Giant George/Lumberjack Jess

Most Days As Champion

1. Abruzzi Slugger- 3989 days (3)
2. Bob Boone- 1956 days (2)
3. Eighth Wonder of the World- 1108 days (2)
4. Moon River- 855 days (3)
5. The King- 592 days (7)
6. Giant George- 427 days
7. Master of Disaster- 422 days
8. Lumberjack Jess- 217 days+
9. Bald Chauffeur 213 days
10. G. "Skulls" Skultnick- 195 days (2)
11. Scarecrow- 193 days (2)
12. The Crusader- 190 days (3)
13. Texecutioner- 189 days
14. Johnny Freedom/Star Spangled Bengal- 124 days (2)
15. Mr. Wrestling- 36 days

Ten Longest Reigns

1. Abruzzi Slugger (1)- 2803 days
2. Bob Boone (2)- 1234 days
3. Eighth Wonder of the World (1)- 1048 days
4. Abruzzi Slugger (2)- 877 days
5. Bob Boone (1)- 722 days
6. Giant George- 427 days
7. Master of Disaster- 422 days
8. Moon River (1)- 313 days
9. Abruzzi Slugger (3)- 309 days
10. Moon River (2)- 294 days
===============
AMA

Names on a screen mean next to nothing. It's time to meet these 15 champions. This wasn't part of the plan, but I felt obligated to pay homage to these stars of yesteryear since we will never meet many of them again, though I do have plans to bring back a few for big angles.

Meet The Champions Part One

Mr. Wrestling- A technically adept heel whose two main claims to fame are being the first World Champion and inventing the Superplex. Rumor has it he's training his son to follow in his footsteps... 

Fun Fact: For the longest time I thought I came up with the Mr. Wrestling name independently. Wrong! Turns out Mr. Wrestling II appeared at Slamboree 93 and I must have got the name from there and then worked backwards to create Mr. Wrestling I.

Abruzzi Slugger- Bruno's figure and, yeah, he's Bruno Sammartino in all but name. Had an epic, years long feud with...

The Eighth Wonder of the World- Andre's figure and rather obviously my thinly veiled version of Andre The Giant. The 8th Wonder stood an imposing 7'4 477 pounds. Only other things worth noting are I knew Andre mainly as a bad guy so the 8th Wonder was big, mean, nasty, late 80s Andre and his 2nd reign came by accident when he broke the Slugger's neck a la Hansen breaking Bruno's neck in real life. The vast majority of those title change dates matter!

*How cool would a fan favorite Bruno vs. rulebreaker Andre feud have been in real life? Talk about a dime magnet!

The King- King Harley Race's figure and for 15 years the big bad of my fed. Oh sure. There were monster heels who were more dominant for a year here and there. But The King was a constant. Always there. Always pissing people off. Usually topping the Most Hated list. He was at the bottom of most every sinister scheme. He was basically to this promotion what The Master was to Pertwee Era Doctor Who. And he was unsurprisingly my favorite character.

He's also why the American and TV Titles exist. Frustrated by his inability to regain the Big One from Bob Boone, The King just went out and created his own American Title that he allegedly won in a tournament in Rio. And when The King was unable to recapture the American Title he created, he did it again by creating the TV Championship. This dude ALWAYS has a plan. And that Lana Star in WOW thing where he's so entertaining everybody just goes along with his delusions.

He's a mix of Harley Race and Jerry Lawler. His wrestling style is more Race (though he did use Lawler's piledriver as a finish) but his persona is pure 90s WWF Lawler. 

The King is directly responsible for oodles of turns, both face and heel, including some I'll get to in a bit. He's also directly responsible for causing more fan favorites to Leave Town than any other rulebreaker.

Alas, the most important player in promotion history ruptured internal organs when he lost the World Championship for the last time to Lumberjack Jess after going through a table on a diving headbutt from apron to floor. He did suck it up to have one final match- a double Retirement Match against longtime rival Moon River at Wrestlefest VIII which saw The King come out on the losing end. 

But you can't keep a bad man down! And The King quickly transitioned into a managerial role with his stated goal in life to take the World Championship from the man he blames for ending his career- Lumberjack Jess. To that end he scoured the Great North Woods and Yukon Territory for nearly half a year until finally finding the manbeast for the job in BEAR CLAW GRIZZ SLAP~! But that's a story for later this week....

Bob Boone- Outback Jack's figure. Boone is actually more of a Funk mashup than a Bob Backlund clone despite the not-so-coincidental dates of his title reigns. Boone was a fan favorite of a different stripe. Think an early antihero. Once upon a time he was 1/2 of a hated heel tag team- the Texas Outlaws w/ The Texecutioner. They ruled the tag team scene for years. They didn't turn good so much as start fighting bigger bads and the crowd ended up siding with the Outlaws, who they could at least respect even if they didn't necessarily like them.

Over time they did grow to like Boone! But he never lost that edge. Boone didn't pander. He didn't kiss ass. Instead he kicked it. He was a mean and ornery Texan who wasn't afraid to bend the rules and never lost his prickliness. He could outwrestle the wrestlers and outbrawl the brawlers. His "Boone" themed moves are the stuff of legend- the Boonebreaker, the Booneplex, the Booneknife Elbows, etc. These won him many a match. Boone was gruff. He was also a promoter's nightmare. This would prove to be his downfall...

When a still evil Mr. Staley (more on him later) took over the company in 1983 with visions of expansion dancing in his head, the last thing he wanted was a no frills iconoclast like Boone on top. Fans liked Boone. There's no denying it. But few LOVED him the way they had the Abruzzi Slugger, or the likes of Moon River, current top hero Lumberjack Jess, and more in later years. Truth is Boone was a hard man to love. Because he was a hard man. While never officially proven, it has long been suspected Staley played a role in the lenient officiating which saw The King cheat to beat Boone for the World Championship.

Boone was blackballed after losing the title. We (or at least Staley) no longer wanted him. And no other promotion would touch him with a ten foot pole due to his unsavory reputation. He became a recluse who has not been seen or heard from in 9 years. Rumor has it Boone spent the last nine years stewing on his ranch near Houston with only one thing on his mind- REVENGE! But this is only speculation fueled by one magazine writer known for having an overactive imagination.

Texecutioner- Terry Funk's figure- Boone's former Texas Outlaw partner who was even crazier than Double B!  His "Texas Gallows" (Last Rites) finisher was THE death blow of his era. The Texecutioner would eventually turn on Boone in what was supposed to be a "Scientific Match" to steal the title, breaking Boone's neck with the Texas Gallows in the process. The rematch six months in the making topped Abruzzi Slugger taking the Championship back from the 8th Wonder in '76 as the biggest crowd and biggest gate in promotion history. None of this is based on Bruno/Larry. Nope. Not at all 

*More later

Meet The Champions Part Two

Johnny Freedom/Star Spangled Bengal- No self respecting American could ever boo a man who entered to this theme...



Mr. Wonderful's figure. Johnny Freedom was "Made In The USA" Lex Luger if Luger had been a more well rounded in ring performer and WWF went all the way with his push. Beloved by the fans in a way not seen since the days when the immortal Abruzzi Slugger ruled the territory, Freedom laid the smack down on Russians, Cubans, and Commies of all stripes. Sheiks, descendants of Axis Powers, Turncoats, Kings, and more succumbed to the awesome power of Freedom. Yet that dastardly King never went down easily. And it would be he who inadvertently created Freedom's alter ego The Star Spangled Bengal...

King cheated (of course) to beat Freedom in a Loser Leaves Town Match. This was a really big deal. Think JYD losing a LLT Match in Mid South or Lawler losing a Hair vs. Hair match in Memphis. Fans from the lakes of Minnesota, to the hills of Tennessee, across the plains of Texas, from sea to shining sea, from Detroit down to Houston, and New York to LA, tore out their hair and wept tears of sorrow.

Only Johnny Freedom had a plan! He came back as the masked Star Spangled Bengal. And OF COURSE this was his theme...



The Bengal soon beat The King for the title on THE FOURTH OF JULY to the biggest pop ever. But that dastardly King once again had a plan of his own. Convincing a still shady Staley of the injustice of it all, the Bengal was given an "unmask or hand back the title" ultimatum. The Bengal was screwed either way. But if he unmasks and it's Johnny Freedom under the mask then he's banned for life for breaking a sacred stipulation. So he gave up the title. 

Freedom then set his focus on the American Title since America > The World. His feud with The King over both the World and American Championships is the stuff of legends. Freedom would go on to hold the American Title more than any other wrestler. But that's a story for another day...

Freedom was better than 95% of wrestlers to ever lace up the boots on a normal day, but he reached another level on patriotic American holidays. Might as well call him "Mr. Independence Day" because he'd win a Championship of some sorts every 4th of July for years. He was nearly as mighty on Memorial, Flag, Labor, and Veteran's Days. Mr. Staley, ever the astute businessmen, made a habit of scheduling shows on these days with Freedom/SSB in high profile matches for maximum dimeage once he saw the light.

One last thing of note concerning the Star Spangled Bengal is "he" would make many more appearances over the years. One particular highlight was the time all the fan favorites pulled a Spartacus by donning the SSB outfit in protest of Freedom's unfair treatment brought about by more machinations from The King and his sleazy lawyer CC McManus. We ended up with a moonlit Star Spangled Bengal, a lazy SSB, a bald Bengal, a hairy SSB, a busting Bengal, and more before an irate King & McManus finally gave in and withdrew their injunction. It was the best. By this point Mr. Staley had turned good and I'm not sure anybody enjoyed it more than the now benevolent billionaire owner.

The Crusader- Rick Martel's figure. The Crusader finally answers the question that has been plaguing wrestling fans for eons- "What if Moredecai was a fan favorite who wrestled like 92-93 Bob Backlund?"

*The Crusader gimmick came about from a bizarre show called The Crusaders I watched with my dad late one night while my mom and brother were stranded at my aunt's house in a snowstorm. Show was about these people who went around performing "random acts of kindness." Told ya I took ideas from EVERYWHERE for my wrestling characters.
Fun Fact: Also remember watching a TGIF B Show called Dinosaurs that weekend.

Anyway, at 230 pounds the warrior of light in white is the lightest man to ever hold the prestigious World Championship. The Crusader was the purist of the pure. He never cheated. Never raised his voice. Some say even his farts smelled sweet. Yet wiser sages know this to be false because we know The Crusader never farted. He barely even threw any impactful moves. An occasional dropkick or slingshot splash in the simmer of battle was as hurty as it got from The Crusader. Yet he won time and time again through his mastery of the sweet science. He perfected the package and baddies came to rue his rollup. His sunset flip was sublime. His armdrags awesome and hip tosses textbook. He'd haunt you with the flying headcissors and pull out a flash frankensteiner.

His go to finisher was the simple Sleeper because it left no marks or lasting damage (look, 90s me thought the sleeper was the wimpiest of all finishers) and of course The Crusader would gently rouse his opponent after putting them to sleep. The holy man believed a match should start with a handshake and end with a handshake. He tried adhering to this rule no matter how evil the opponent. The Crusader invented ROH!

His main goal was not to win titles. For shiny things were beneath this Godly man. Yet he happened to win them anyway because he was that darn good. But his primary goal was causing sinners to repent. He would show them the error of their ways through words and through scientific wrestling in the hope he could convert them to the side of Good. He was surprisingly successful in this *ahem* crusade.He memorably converted three wrestlers I will cover later, though he never could convert that darn King. The Crusader ultimately ascended to Heaven shortly after his third conversion, though he does still float in from time to time to offer some sage advice. Not kidding about the "float" part either. You'll see...

Scarecrow- Demolition Ax's figure. Tombstone was his finish. He was an Undertaker ripoff. He would not be the last. Look, if you're going to steal from the same gimmick thrice you better make sure you're stealing from the GOAT gimmick. I knew what I was doing.

Anyway, Scarecrow started out as The King's henchman. And brother this guy was WILD. He made Bob Boone and The Texecutioner look like shrinking violets. He wore a demonic mask and let out demonic cackles whilst inflicting pain. He was the living personification of Darkness. He was the brawliest brawler to ever brawl. Why it's ALMOST as if Scarecrow were created just to feud with The Crusader. But of course I'd never do anything that obvious  All seemed lost when Scarecrow destroyed The Crusader for the World Championship on Halloween.

Yet The Crusader did not yield. He would never. He not only regained the title from 'Crow, but he kept working on converting the darkest man to ever lace up a pair of boots....this sawed off Undertaker...to the side of good. And when The King and His Court got a little too big for their britches in their treatment of Scarecrow after King beat The Crusader for the World Championship, it finally happened...

Scarecrow turned on The King!!! This was our big "Undertaker turns on Jake" moment. The two were now mortal enemies and Scarecrow would ultimately dethrone The King at the very first Wrestlefest. The sinister figure had become an unlikely hero. So beloved was this Dark Avenger that he would be immortalized in song...



Scarecrow took the title from The King and all rejoiced. But their war was not yet over. They would battle many more times over the years until the dastardly King finally rid his Kingdom of Scarecrow by beating the unlikely hero in a Loser Leaves Town Match Yet some say...

He's out there still. *Scarecrow cackle*

G. "Skulls" Skultnick- One Man Gang's figure. Splash for a finish. A big, bad, brawling, brutish biker heavily influenced by OMG himself. Skulls would take the title from Scarecrow in a proto-hardcore match with a little help from The King (told you he's the straw that stirs the drink). Skulls was already on a path of destruction before winning the title. That path of destruction only accelerated after winning the big one. He hospitalized many a good man during his reign of terror. We were in need of a hero. Who could save us from this bloodthirsty brute?

The Crusader! Duh. Crusader got the better of the bad boy with a simple Crucifix. An even bigger shocker went down when Crusader repeated the Crucifix trick in the rematch. Skulls manned up and shook The Crusader's hand! The King was FURIOUS. So Skulls kicked his butt. In the span of one match he went from hated heel to beloved babyface.

But I told ya that dastardly King always found a way. And he would pull another rabbit out of his hat when he took the title from The Crusader one month later after Crusader gave Skulls strict instructions not to interfere. Skulls listened, as he was now sitting under Crusader's learning tree, but The Crusader paid for it. It all led to Skulls dethroning The King at Wrestlefest II.

Like Scarecrow, Skulls didn't really change his ways all that much. For the most part he just sinned on the sinners rather than the righteous. And the fans loved him for it, though Crusader sometimes did shake his head at Skulls' antics. Yet the big man WAS trying. We'll have to come back to Skulls later, but he would soon lose his title to a man he would become intertwined with...

Bald Chauffeur- King Kong Bundy's figure with another Splash finisher. Bald Chauffeur was King Kong Bundy if KKB were a hyperactive deranged chauffeur who sped to the ring in a truck (years before Austin, JBL, and Eddie, mind you) and would later enter to Ultimate Warrior's theme after turning babyface. Tbh I remember The Chauffeurs more as fan favorites than rulebreakers, but they did start out as baddies.

Anyway, Chauffeur was the latest big bad. He would take the title from Skulls in another proto-hardcore match after RUNNING OVER SKULLS WITH HIS TRUCK while Skultnick was distracted by Bald's brother, the Hairy Chauffeur (who was ironically bald- The "Hairy" part of his name stemming from his copious amounts of body hair). This vehicular assault would end the career of G. "Skulls" Skultnick.

Bald Chauffeur had the most dominant rulebreaker reign in years before finally dropping the strap to Moon River at Wrestlefest III. The Rivers vs. Chauffeurs was THE defining feud of the era. Bald vs. Moon. Hairy vs. Lazy. Chauffeurs vs. Rivers. These combinations warred all over Johnny Freedom's country. The four men would later become great friends- a sort of larger than life good guy Four Horsemen- and that's what most fans remember them for. But the real ones know...the olds remember ...

Bald Chauffeur (and brother Hairy) saw the error of their rulebreaker ways after losing their respective titles at Wrestlefest III. The Crusader had been working on them for a while. The Chauffeurs came to respect the Rivers. The new and improved Bald Chauffeur now felt TERRIBLE about ending the career of one G. "Skulls" Skultnick. So Bald gave Skulls the greatest gift he could give- his iconic red pickup truck...

G "Skulls" Skultnick becomes The Crusader- With The Crusader having ascended to Heaven after converting three sinners (really 4 if you count Hairy), Skulls took it upon himself to become the new crusader for justice. Having suffered a debilitating, career ending injury, Skulls could not get back in the ring. So he convinced Mr. Staley to make him a troubleshooting referee. Whenever a bad guy got out of line, Skulls would come hauling ass (Skulls was the wrestler most likely to use the word "ass") in his big red truck to put an end to those shenanigans. This made life nearly impossible for the bad boys. The King in particular threw so many hissy fits, each one more GLORIOUS than the last. But all good things must end and The King, with the help of his Lawyer-turned-Super Agent CC McManus finally put an end to Skulls' righteousness through shady legal machinations. This was the first time McManus abused the law to aid the baddies. It would not be the last...

One final chapter of the Skulls story must be told. The "G" in his name was a great mystery for years. Only my brother knew the answer. I guessed and guessed with every boys name I could think of and most of the girls. Over 20 years after creating the Skulls character my brother finally spilled the beans. It was....

Guillermo.

Meet The Champions Part Three

Moon River- Ted Arcidi's figure. Finisher was a Superfly Splash. Also famous for slamming fatties.

Moon River's origin stems from an end of the season celebration at the bar that sponsored my Little League Championship winning baseball team. This establishment had a jukebox! We had never encountered one before and were therefore fascinated by this music box. The female barflies must have found us adorable because they kept feeding us quarters in between tendies & fries. The songs I remember from that night we rocked the jukebox are Lazy River, Pinball Wizard, something called Zigzag, and of course Moon River... 



Nelson Muntz's favorite wrestler was more my brother's guy than mine if we're being honest. Moon didn't really have a hook. But I must not have objected too much because he was basically our Hulk Hogan for a good while. I guess that was his hook- our Hulk Hogan?

Anyway, I already touched on the epic Chauffeurs vs. Rivers feud in my Bald Chauffeur writeup. The Rivers had an equally epic feud with another tag team in the legendary Heinie & Boto who dominated our league the way Demolition dominated real life WWF.

Moon won his first World Championship by slamming his nemesis Bald Chauffeur at Wrestlefest III. The two made peace after that and the Rivers & Chauffeurs would become allies who made life a living hell for the baddies. Moon would go on to slam many more fatties in championship matches over the years. 

But it wasn't all smooth sailing because there was always a bigger bad on the horizon. The first of these was The Master of Disaster. Then came the legendary Giant George. I'll cover both of these monsters in a minute. And came finally the old adversary himself, The King. He ended Moon's last championship run in a shocking upset. Moon was broken down by this point, a shell of his former self, after carrying the promotion on his broad back for years in wars with the Chauffeurs, Heinie & Boto, The King, and especially the Master of Disaster & Giant George. So Moon retired soon after his third Championship run ended, beating The King one final time in a double Retirement Match at Wrestlefest VIII. Just in case I never get around to covering the American and Tag Team Champion lineages in depth, here is Moon's brother Lazy River's theme...



*Wondering, and not for the first time, why we had wrestlers named Moon River & Lazy River when PINBALL WIZARD was RIGHT THERE?!?

Master of Disaster- Big John's Studd's figure. Big John Studd's dimensions. Wrestled like 1989 Royal Rumble Big John Studd. But this giant inexplicably used the Ghetto Blaster/Back Brain Kick for a finisher. Because we were dumb kids.

Curious how I got the Master of Disaster name in 89-90. The most famous Master of Disaster is of course the great Apollo Creed. It was one of his many, many nicknames. But I wouldn't watch the Rocky series for a few more years. Had the name already entered into pop culture lexicon? Or perhaps I got it from my Pennsylvania Cousins (who still lived in Baltimore) who were already Rocky (and Rambo) marks...

Anyway, I don't have much more to add on the MoD. He beat all Moon's buddies (Lazy, the Chauffeurs, Good Buster) for a year before dropping the strap back to Moon at Wrestlefest V. Then he poofed. Master of Disaster was a big, bad heel, but there would soon be bigger and badder...

Giant George- Andre's figure. Old Andre's dimensions- 7'4 or 7'5, 525 or 550 pounds. And he was basically a superpowered Andre. Think Andre the Giant with Gregor Clegane's demeanor. Giant George was a stone cold killer who legit invented 90s wrestling.

He was the biggest, baddest heel in the promotion's history. The 8th Wonder, Skulls, Bald, and MoD were gentle babes compared to this gigantic psycho killer. 

Sure, Boone, Texecutioner, Scarecrow, Chauffeurs, Skulls, and more dabbled in hardcore wrestling, but Giant George took it to the next level. He was hardcore before hardcore was even a thing. His coup de grace was "Death From Above" where he'd climb up the rafters (bookcase) and powerslam his poor opponents from rafters to ring. BOOM! We broke a few official WWF rings before switching to a square yellow wooden board dubbed "Colorado" when our parents justifiably refused to get us another and I'm pretty certain Giant George was directly responsible for the destruction of a ring or two. 

In addition to inventing Hardcore Wrestling, Giant George also invented the NWO. He'd write "GG" on the stomachs of his defeated opponents. There was a time when nearly every figure we had was branded with the infamous Double G. It was a pain to get off too! So, yeah, the NWO stole that whole spray paint gimmick from the one true Innovator of Violence- Giant George.

There was also some 1996 Giant in Giant George (despite George predating The Giant by approximately 6 real time years) as Double G was much more athletic than his predecessor- The 8th Wonder of the World. Told ya Giant George invented 90s modern wrestling. 

Moon River finally ended George's year+ reign of terror at Wrestlefest VII. This has to be one of the biggest matches we ever had, if not THE biggest. It was our Hogan vs. Andre @ III. 

But Moon was never really the same again after his wars with Double G. Giant George decimated that entire generation of good guys- Lazy River, the Chauffeurs, Good Buster, Moon himself. You won't be seeing any of them again. They're done. And so is Giant George...

Because Mr. Staley adopted a NEVER AGAIN policy once George was finally dethroned by Moon. The now-benevolent boss had grown tired of seeing big bullies run roughshod over his promotion. The 8th Wonder, Skulls & Bald Chauffeur as rulebreakers, Master of Disaster, Giant George, and Kim Chee (who we'll cover in a few days) were all over 350 pounds. They caused too many injuries and created too much havoc. So Staley laid down his famous "350 pound rule" which banned 350+  pounders from competing in the promotion. This rule is still in effect today.

For that reason Giant George is THE most influential wrestler on the modern era. An era headlined by...

Lumberjack Jess- Hillbilly Jim's figure. The name comes from an episode of Full House which saw Uncle Jesse portray a character of the same name while our Lumberjack's character finally answers the age old question "What if AWA's Yukon John (The Berzerker) got the Hulk Hogan push?" Hailing from the Great North Woods and measuring in at an impressive 6'8 313 pounds, Jess is one inch taller and 10 pounds heavier than "The Hulkster" himself because bigger is better. He also has some attributes of Paul Bunyan and just a dash of Launchpad McQuack in his character.

Come to think of it Paul Bunyan and Duck Tales are two of the bigger influences on this promotion. Paul Bunyan stories are directly responsible for a few secondary champions I may or may not cover later this week while Mr. Staley's whole character, and character arc, is a straight up Scrooge McDuck ripoff. Then there's The Conquistador and Miner 49er (EDIT: actually a Scooby Doo, it turns out) and well, I mustn't get ahead of myself.

Anyway, Lumberjack Jess. Well, he's the top dog of the current era. He's been champion since dethroning The King over 7 months ago. He's loud and proud, large and in charge. His eating exploits are legendary. He really, really likes his pancakes. He sports a big bushy beard. Many "critters" live in said beard. He's famously known for pulling them out during his wild, shouty interviews. He also howls. And his fans howl back at him. Many of those fans are children. They're part of his "Junior Jacks" fanclub. They're the Hulkamaniacs of this universe. Sometimes Jess enters to CCR's Bad Moon Rising and other times he opts for Warren Zevon's Werewolves of London.

He's defended the World Championship against all comers- Mr. Prestigious, "Voodoo Priest" Master of the Crossroads, "Mongolian Giant" Gingham Koh, and most recently Doc South who, despite the name, is not a doctor from below the Mason Dixon line, but rather a deranged ex-con whose only known performance of "surgery" was removing the limbs of his still-living victims. 

But now an old enemy has come back from the past to haunt him with yet another old enemy in tow. Lumberjack Jess won his first World Championship from The King in January of this year. The King then lost a Retirement Match to Moon River at Wrestlefest VIII in March and subsequently disappeared. Fans rejoiced, thinking they were finally rid of The King once and for all.

They should have known better. They should have known The King would never go quietly into the night. The King spent those missing months plotting revenge. His desire for revenge saw him scour the coldest, most Godforsaken regions of North America in search of Lumberjack Jess' old enemy of Lumberjack Jess'....a quasi-mythical beastman Jess encountered during his early Lumberjacking days....a creature so ferocious it is rumored to be the one thing Lumberjack Jess fears...

And The King found what he was looking for. He found...

BEAR CLAW GRIZZ SLAP~!

And that's a story for another day...

American Championship History

The King	9/1/79	4/21/80	233 days
Doorknob Clinton	4/21/80	8/9/80	110 days
The King (2)	8/9/80	12/8/80	121 days
Steamboat Gordon	12/8/80	3/16/81	98 days
The King (3)	3/16/81	6/20/81	96 days
Good Dog McGee	6/20/81	9/1/81	73 days
Bad Dog McGee	9/1/81	11/23/81	83 days
Good Dog McGee (2)	11/23/81	12/29/81	36 days
The King (4)	12/29/81	11/25/82	331 days
Ponce DeLeon	11/25/82	1/22/83	58 days
El Conquistador	1/22/83	4/26/83	94 days
Ponce DeLeon (2)	4/26/83	6/15/83	50 days
The King (5)	6/15/83	7/4/83	19 days
Johnny Freedom	7/4/83	10/25/83	113 days
Russian Bear	10/25/83	11/11/83	17 days
Johnny Freedom (2)	11/11/83	2/11/84	92 days
Steel Sheik	2/11/84	2/20/84	9 days
Johnny Freedom (3)	2/20/84	3/9/84	18 days
Russian Tower	3/9/84	9/3/84	178 days
Johnny Freedom (4)	9/3/84	12/7/84	95 days
Mitsu The Rising Sun	12/7/84	12/25/84	18 days
Johnny Freedom (5)	12/25/84	3/29/85	94 days
Black Knight	3/29/85	5/27/85	59 days
Star Spangled Bengal (6*)	5/27/85	6/28/85	32 days
Stalin	6/28/85	7/4/85	6 days
Johnny Freedom (7)	7/4/85	8/28/86	420 days
Hairy Chauffeur	8/28/86	3/29/87	213 days
Lazy River	3/29/87	10/3/87	188 days
Bad Buster	10/3/87	11/26/87	54 days
Good Buster	11/26/87	1/24/88	59 days
Bad Buster (2)	1/24/88	3/27/88	63 days
Lazy River (2)	3/27/88	1/15/89	294 days
Mr. Prestigious	1/15/89	8/28/89	225 days
Lazy River (3)	8/28/89	1/21/90	146 days
Mr. Prestigious (2)	1/21/90	8/27/90	218 days
Lazy River (4)	8/27/90	1/19/91	145 days
Kim Chee	1/19/91	1/19/92	365 days
Boston Strongman	1/19/92	----	223+days

*Johnny Freedom under a mask to play mind games with the masked Black Knight and his liege lord The King.

*Realized I made one unforgivable error last night so after a quick edit I decided to expand on this part of the post and separate from it from the original.

Origin of the American Champion

The King allegedly won a tournament in Rio de Janeiro for the title. The real story is The King simply created his own vanity title out of frustration brought about by his inability to dethrone World Champion Bob Boone. The tournament King claims to have won in Rio is a pure canard.

Most Decorated American Champions
Name: # of reigns-total days as champion

1. Johnny Freedom/Star Spangled Bengal: 7-864
2. The King: 5-800
3. Lazy River: 4-773
4. Mr. Prestigious: 2-443
5. Kim Chee: 1-365
6. Boston Strongman: 1-223+
7. Hairy Chauffeur: 1-213
8. Russian Tower: 1-178
9. Bad Buster: 2-117
10. Doorknob Clinton: 1-110
11. Good Dog McGee: 2-109
12. Ponce DeLeon: 2-108
13. Steamboat Gordon: 1-98
14. El Conquistador: 1-94
15. Bad Dog McGee: 1-83
16. Good Buster: 1-59
17. Black Knight: 1-56
18. Mitsu The Rising Sun: 1-18
19. Russian Bear: 1-17
20. Steel Sheik: 1-9
21. Stalin: 1-6

Ten Longest American Championship Reigns

1. Johnny Freedom (7)- 420 days
2. Kim Chee- 365 days
3. The King (4)- 331 days
4. Lazy River (2)- 294 days
5. The King (1)- 233 days
6. Mr. Prestigious (1)- 225 days
7. Boston Strongman- 223+ days
8. Mr. Prestigious (2)- 218 days
9. Hairy Chauffeur- 213 days
10. Lazy River (1)- 188 days

Notable Notes

The American Championship is the #2 singles title in the promotion. Think our version of the IC or US Titles. It's usually the 2nd most important title overall, though there are times when the Tag or TV Titles get a higher billing when there's a really hot feud, or a match with a lot of hype.

The 406 pound Kim Chee (Kamala's figure) was the last of the 350+ pounders. He was grandfathered in due to being the reigning American Champion at the time of Mr. Staley's edict. For one full year Chee ran roughshod over the promotion until finally meeting his match at the hands of the mighty 280 pound Boston Strongman (Ted Arcidi's figure) who remains champion as of this day- 8/29/92. Chee was forced to leave the promotion after losing the title in accordance with the 350 pound rule.

One of the more decorated champions in American Title history is Lazy River (Hillbilly Jim's figure). The brother of Moon was a bizarre mix of a high flying Hillbilly Jim and proto-Orange Cassidy with Jerry Blackwell's Hulk Up. My brother and I were at odds over his finisher when we discussed this stuff some two decades after the fact. He swore it was the Lazy Elbow (Randy Savage flying elbow) while I was equally adamant it was the Lazy Legdrop (Bobby Eaton's Alabama Jam) so we'll just say he used both finishers interchangeably.

Gee, I wonder who Mr. Prestigious is based on? To make it even more obvious his figure was Greg Valentine rather than Paul Orndorff.

Bad Buster vs. Good Buster was a memorable feud. Both good guys and bad guys needed a 5th person for a big Survivor Series showdown. The bad guys (me) introduced their mystery partner Buster (Big John Studd's figure) first. Then the good guys (my brother) brought out their 5th person who was also named Buster (Dynamite Kid's figure). This infuriated me in real life. Now I think it was brilliant. The two went on to feud for quite some time and both guys used the lame back body drop as a finisher. Because we were dumb kids. 

Good Dog (Hogan's figure) & Bad Dog McGee (Volkoff's figure) were the original brothers who couldn't get along. They'd later put aside their differences to form a championship winning tag team with an interesting good cop/bad cop dynamic.

Ponce DeLeon (Tito's figure) & El Conquistador (Ax's figure) used to be a championship tag team with Conq as the Jannetty of the duo going by "Santiago" (Steamboat's figure). He adopted the Conquistador persona after turning heel and would have a long arc which eventually saw him revert back to fan favorite status after Ponce suffered a career ending injury.

Black Knight (Ax's figure) was The King's imposing masked henchman who he called upon to do the dirty work. Think the Bill Laimbeer of wrestling. The Black Knight would also have a long storyline arc I'll cover more in depth in the TV or Tag Title synopses.

Doorknob Clinton is pretty much the greatest name ever which is precisely why I stole it (and the Brothers McGee) from a baseball themed Choose Your Own Adventure book. Steamboat Gordon, which is a 100% Baker original, isn't too far behind on the pantheon of Great Names. Gordon was a Mississippi riverboat captain who became a pro wrestler while Clinton had been a baseball player (duh) before becoming a pro wrestler. Think a fan favorite Abe "Knuckleball" Schwartz in Clinton's case.

Russian Bear, Russian Tower, Steel Sheik, Stalin, and Mitsu The Rising Sun were evil foreigners of the month for Johnny Freedom to overcome with Tower (a Cousin creation) being the best of the bunch. Several of those guys were also Tag Team champions.

EDIT

Hit a snag the last time I worked on my project- Wednesday, I think it was. Then I had a busy few days and got wrapped up in Hogan posting tonight. Maybe I get back at it tomorrow. But first, a Storytime...

Aug 31, 2023 0:03:40 GMT Baker said:

Man, I thought my early 2000s grizzled phase was just that- a phase. Wrong! Turns out I'd been on this kick since way back in '92. At some point I'm gonna have to take a diversion to tell the story of Grizzled Day.

It's Not A Phase, Mom!: The Story of Grizzled Day

I made it all through high school without going through any major phases, being part of any scene, or really getting wrapped up in any dumb fads. You know how they had jocks, preps, nerds, rockers, gangstas, hippies, goths, etc.? Yeah, I didn't go for any of that stuff. That would be picking a side, maan. Though I did have acquaintances in most of the groups.

I was basic. Just wanted to blend into the background and maybe shoot the shit a little with Matt The IRS Fan until I could get back home to live my real life away from the boring confines of prison school. So I'd just quietly (unless Matt was there) sit in the back of class doing my best to avoid attracting unwanted attention whilst often daydreaming about muh rasslin' and doing just enough to maintain a solid B-B+ average. Enough to keep my demanding mother off my back without attracting too much attention from teachers who might want to push me. Yeah, I was a slacker. Albeit a very polite one! I didn't like being pushed. Still don't. I'll do what I have to, but mostly I just want to be left alone. Anyway...

Then I went a little crazy and phasey after graduating high school. Already covered my Party Boy Phase in a few other threads. There was also the Floral Phase where I wore Hawaiian shirts and a floral bucket hat. My friend's dad hated this phase. "Are you a fa**ot?" Also got the classic Simpsons line a lot- "There's only two kinds of guys who wear Hawaiian shirts: gay guys and big fat party animals." I was not fat. Of course, with me being me, this only egged me on to wear EVEN MORE floral stuff. Fwiw that friend's dad was actually a really cool guy. The coolest of all my 2000s friend's parents. But, yeah, he was not a fan of the Floral Phase. Not a fan at all. Then there was my Rocker Phase which I covered extensively in my Demon Semen storytimes. I even went through the Popped Collar and Hair Gel phase in the mid 2000s. I'll accurately pin the blame on a girl for that one. And then there was my glorious Grizzled Phase...

"Grizzled." That's the word we used. "Country" also would have worked. My two best friends and I became wannabe country boys for a little while around 2002ish. Being a character in a Highwayman song was the pinnacle of living to us. We romanticized blue collar workers like miners, lumberjacks, and farmers in addition to the old pioneers and explorers. This was real work that mattered. Everything else was nothing but plastic, the pointless residuum of a modernity which was inherently phony. The only thing better than being grizzled was being old and grizzled. You better believe we respected our elders! 

Funny thing is none of us were very country. Bryan at least had some grizzled bona fides. He loved guns! He also liked country music and his father was relatively grizzled. But Bryan had also grown up in the suburbs and moved out to the exurbs in the summer of 2000- Just a few months after we became friends when I dropped a timely King Philip of Macedon reference. Yeah, it was that kind of friendship. Know how in the last episode of Seinfeld the judge is like "I don't know how you four ever got together?" Yeah, it was kind of like that with my five man band in the early-mid 2000s. We were all SO different. Anyway, his semi-grizzled father owned a second property. Tru grizz don't own no second home! So we'll give him a 6/10 on the Grizz Scale. Bryan was a very tall man and Nietzche fanboy who fancied himself an intellectual. His attire consisted of black t-shirts, black trenchcoat, the occasional flannel, and jeans. He always wore jeans. My man even wore jeans on the beach! He was allegedly voted "Most Likely To Go Columbine" in a school survey that did not make the final cut of his high school yearbook. This guy was my best friend for years!  

I was soft. Born in Baltimore. Lived there all through elementary school. Had been in the suburbs ever since. I was a big country music fan from 91-94 though! And I got back into a little bit (mostly classic stuff I hadn't heard during my earlier country music fan period) since my two new friends were a country music fanatic and a country music respecter. My father did have some outdoorsy hobbies (mostly before my brother and I were born) but he was also so flash that I still occasionally call him "Hollywood" to this very day. 2/10 on the grizzled scale with a point earned for his youthful outdoorsy hobbies.

Put it this way. You never saw two guys more excited to go clothes shopping than my dad and brother were when we made our trip to the Reading Clothing Outlets a few days before school commenced in 95 & 96. I didn't get it. Even my mom was bemused. I didn't know who Tommy Hilfiger was and I didn't care to know. Polo? That's a sport for rich people. Nautica? I assume that's something to do with boats? Timberland? Sounds like a logging thing. Interesting! Is Lumberjack Jess involved? Izod? You mean those stupid alligator shirts I wore as a kid? That's "cool" now? I just wanted to watch muh Superstars and Exosquad! But at least Rick came along with us. That was cool. The look on poor Matt The IRS Fan's face (for he was a fellow 'basic' type) when I showed up the first day of school wearing the fancy new flash clothes my parents insisted they buy for me was priceless. I hated that whole thing. I might attract unwanted attention! NO! Anyway, both my parents lived in Baltimore for their first 40 years and change before moving out to the suburbs. So I'm only slightly more tru country grizz than Will Smith in the Fresh Prince.

If I was soft, which I was, then our 3rd main man was SAWFT. He had lived in the suburbs all his life and was a golf-loving preppy. He was a country music fanatic though! And his dad had a teeny tiny touch of grizz in him- 3/10, maybe even 4/10.

Fwiw all our mothers were a generous 1/10 on the grizzled scale. And all our parents were separated or divorced. Of the five core guys in our group, four of our parents were separated or divorced, and the fifth guy's parents would go down that same path a few years later around 2006. I feel like that may play some small part in how these five very different people ended up becoming inseparable for a few years.

So none of us were tru country grizz. But we desperately wanted to be! About 3 or 4 nights a week I'd/we'd go to Bryan's after work. We usually just watched tv and talked (often gossiping about our coworkers) until 2-3 in the morning while my cohort(s) drank. I flip flopped between total alcohol abstinence and extreme moderation during our grizzled phase. This meant I was often the designated driver. I made so many food runs during this period it's not funny. It honestly got annoying real quick. I might have one or two drinks a week during a weak willpower week. My cohort(s) went through that every few minutes...

Especially Bryan. Dude drank like a fish. He was my best friend from 2000-04 or 05 but he could also get really annoying. Not to mention creepy. I already mentioned the Columbine thing so, yeah. Over time his antics got to be too much and I moved on. The 3rd Man honestly always got on my nerves. He was that friend nobody really likes who you keep around for....reasons? He separated himself from the main group after hooking up with an older woman and developing a coke habit around 2005, about a year before that whole clique fizzled out.

Anyway, gotta get back on track. Sometimes we'd play Smackdown or shoot pool (which I sucked at). And sometimes another friend or two would show up. But it was usually just the 2 or 3 of us chit chatting and watching tv. Fwiw Saturday was the big group outing night and those usually took place at another locale. It was almost certainly during one of our nightlong chat/tv/drinking sessions at Bryan's that we came up with the idea for Grizzled Day...

We'd meet at work one morning sporting our most grizzled look and.....our coworkers would take pictures? Ok, it was really dumb! But we were SO into it. I had been rocking the Tommy Dreamer goatee for a few years and now decided to grow a proper beard for what I believe was the first time in my life. I ended up growing a pretty boss beard if I do say so myself. Bryan also decided to grow a beard. His was really bad! All sparse and patchy. And to the surprise of no one the 3rd man could not actually grow facial hair. 

But we built this up as An Event...a Real Happening. We showed up at work on the planned morning, an off day, in our most grizzled garb. Other coworkers who were off that day also showed up just to see what us crazy kids would come up with. I remember wearing boots, long brown wool socks, a flannel shirt, flannel jacket, long underwear (we must have picked a cold, wintery day for maximum grizz effect), gloves, a sort of combo Russian hat/Aviator hat that an old girlfriend had memorably dubbed "the Metallic Bucket," and the coup de grace- an onion on my belt! Sadly, few understood the significance of the onion. But that only made it funnier! The onion was easily my favorite part. Also remember having the toughest time figuring out how to attach that stupid onion to my belt. Thankfully one of my girl friends came through in the clutch with a very cunning plan. Oh, and we chainsmoked the entire time because of course we did. Bryan smoked unfiltered Lucky Strikes. I smoked Winston Ultra Lights. And the 3rd Man smoked some sort of Menthols. I don't like to toot my own horn, but toot toot. I was the most grizzled looking member of the gang. Pictures were taken. I'm sure they still exist somewhere. People were amused. A good time was had by all. 

Oh, forgot to mention our extremely gay manager got in on the act as well in a shocking last minute swerve. This guy was a hoot...A real riot. He was the first gay I ever met. He was kind of like Mr. Humphries from Are You Being Served, only more flamboyant, if you can believe it. Another time he dressed up as me for Halloween! He nailed it, too. Had my mannerisms down, spouted my catchphrases, and everything. Our dishwasher Crazy Jack did a double take when he saw one of us and then saw the other. Dude literally rubbed his eyes as if he were seeing things. Yeah, I'm sure he was drunk or hungover. He usually was. But it was still a great moment. One day I might have to tell some Crazy Jack stories. That guy was a Character. So was Gay Manager.

Mission accomplished, I/we soon moved on to the next phase. Pretty sure my Rocker Phase came next. But Grizzled Day will go down in history.

Not gonna lie. Even though it's been over 20 years since my Grizzled Phase I sometimes still long to grow a beard, get weird, and disappear into the mountains (nothin' but clowns down here). Sometimes I still long for the romance of the forest(!). Sometimes I still hear the call of the wild...

*Might delete this after a day or two. I don't like sharing too many shoot names. Which is why I did not name the 3rd Man, Gay Manager, Other Friend and His Dad, or any of the girls involved.

TV Title History

The King	5/4/85	5/11/85	7 days
Kidco	5/11/85	6/1/85	21 days
The King (2)	6/1/85	7/6/85	35 days
Ole The Big Swede	7/6/85	7/27/85	21 days
The King (3)	7/27/85	8/24/85	28 days
Seashore The Magician	8/24/85	9/14/85	21 days
The King (4)	9/14/85	10/19/85	35 days
Santiago	10/19/85	12/28/85	70 days
Black Knight*	12/28/85	4/7/86	100 days
Jeeves	4/7/86	4/26/86	19 days
The King (5)	4/26/86	5/17/86	21 days
White Knight (2)*	5/17/86	8/28/86	103 days
The King [6]	8/28/86	9/6/86	9 days
Maryland Man	9/6/86	10/4/86	28 days
The King (7)	10/4/86	1/3/87	91 days
Norton Nelson (3)*	1/3/87	3/29/87	85 days
The King (8)	3/29/87	4/18/87	20 days
Purple Cow	4/18/87	5/9/87	21 days
The King (9)	5/9/87	6/13/87	35 days
Sir Norton Nelson (4)*	6/13/87	11/26/87	166 days
The King (10)	11/26/87	12/5/87	9 days
Italian Stallion	12/5/87	2/5/88	62 days
Peter Moneybags	2/5/88	3/27/88	51 days
Italian Stallion (2)	3/27/88	4/30/88	34 days
The King (11)	4/30/88	5/28/88	28 days
Indian Chief	5/28/88	6/25/88	28 days
The King (12)	6/25/88	7/16/88	21 days
Mr. Oregon	7/16/88	8/6/88	21 days
The King (13)	8/6/88	8/29/88	23 days
Sir Norton Nelson (5)*	8/29/88	4/2/89	216 days
The King (14)	4/2/89	1/21/90	294 days
Tugboat Thomas	1/21/90	4/1/90	70 days
Peter Moneybags (2)	4/1/90	8/27/90	148 days
Miner 49er	8/27/90	11/22/90	87 days
Jupiter~	11/22/90	1/19/91	58 days
Miner 49er (2)	1/19/91	2/1/91	13 days
Peter Moneybags (3)	2/1/91	3/24/91	51 days
"Jumpin" Jim Jupiter~ (2)	3/24/91	6/15/91	73 days
Bruno	6/15/91	8/26/91	72 days
Doc Otis	8/26/91	11/27/91	91 days
Red Baron	11/27/91	1/19/92	53 days
Sailing Seaver	1/19/92	4/5/92	77 days
Mr. Morris+ (2)	4/5/92	6/1/92	57 days
Miner 49er (3)	6/1/92	8/29/92	89 days
The Timekeeper	8/29/92	Present	10 days+

*Black Knight/White Knight/Norton Nelson/Sir Norton Nelson are different names for the same wrestler
~Same applies Jupiter/"Jumpin" Jim Jupiter
+And with Bruno/Mr. Morris

TV Title Stats
Name/# of Reigns/Days as TV Champ

1. Black Knight/White Knight/Sir Norton Nelson: 5-670
2. The King: 14-656
3. Peter Moneybags: 3-250
4. Miner 49er: 3-189
5. "Jumpin" Jim Jupiter: 2-131
6. Bruno/Mr. Morris: 2-129
7. Italian Stallion: 2-96
8. Doc Otis: 1-91
9. Sailing Seaver: 1-77
10t. Santiago: 1-70
10t. Tugboat Thomas: 1-70
Red Baron: 1-53
Maryland Man: 1-28
Indian Chief: 1-28
Kidco: 1-21
Ole The Big Swede: 1-21
Seashore The Magician: 1-21
Purple Cow: 1-21
Mr. Oregon: 1-21
Jeeves: 1-19
The Timekeeper: 1-10+

Longest Reigns

1. The King (14)- 294 days
2. Sir Norton Nelson (5)- 216 days
3. Sir Norton Nelson (4)- 166 days
4. Peter Moneybags (2)- 148 days
5. White Knight (2)- 103 days
6. Black Knight (1)- 100 days
7. Doc Otis- 91 days
8. Miner 49er (2)- 89 days
9. Norton Nelson (3)- 85 days
10. Miner 49er (1)- 87 days

TV Title History

Frustrated by his inability to recapture the World, American, and Tag Titles, The King created his own title just as he done once before with the American Championship. This time it was the TV Title. And this time he didn't even go through the mental gymnastics of creating a fictitious tournament to win. He simply declared himself the biggest tv star in the history of wrestling and vowed to defend his title every week. Not for the aggrandizement of his own ego, mind you, but for the good of the promotion. What a guy! As always with The King, the Lana Star Principle applies where it's so entertaining most everybody just grudgingly goes along with it whilst shaking their head in bemusement

For once The King mostly lived up to his word. The TV Title really was defended on tv most weeks during the championship's early years. Yet as time marched on those near-weekly defenses became a thing of the past. That's why you'll see so many short reigns early in the title's history.

The TV is historically the lowest ranking championship in the promotion and the one most frequently defended on tv. The bulk of the title's history saw the latest good guy to garner a decent fan following feud with The King over the championship for a few months. Though at times during hot feuds the title's prestige has briefly eclipsed that of the Tag and/or American Championships. 

Meet The Champions

The King's very first title defense came against a scrawny, never before seen jobber who was introduced as Kid Co... before The King jumped him. We never did get the young lad's full name. Then he pulled off the upset of the century with a three-quarter nelson outta nowhere to pin the most decorated wrestler in the history of the promotion. Kid Co became Kidco (Piper's figure) and the name stuck. Alas, the Cinderella Story only lasted 3 weeks before The King put a hurting on the youngster in regaining his title. The point of the Kidco miracle reign was to prove that anything can happen here in the _WF. To this day the 222 pounder remains the lightest wrestler to win championship gold in the promotion.

Ole The Big Swede (Hogan's figure) was a large and in charge lumberjack whose other main claim to fame is introducing our current World Champion Lumberjack Jess to wrestling, training him, and forming a championship tag team with his protege years after his short TV Title reign.

Seashore The Magician was more of a prankster a la babyface Doink with magic than Papa Shango (or Master of the Crossroads here in Bizarro World). Seashore never really got over so he soon dropped the strap back to The King.

Santiago was 1/2 of The Explorers championship tag team with partner Ponce DeLeon. He'd later turn on DeLeon to become the dark, brooding Conquistador. They feuded over the American Title before Santiago underwent another change of heart after his mentor Ponce suffered a career ending injury at the hands of The King. Santiago's theme was his name sung over and over again to this banger of a tune...



Fun Fact: Ponce DeLeon & (Benito) Santiago crossed over to wrestling from our backyard baseball league because we were very weird children.

Black Knight was The King's Champion (top henchman) known for his lethal Full Nelson before taking offense to His Majesty's treatment of his other lackeys The Jester & Jeeves. This led to the Knight turning on The King to become the White Knight. The two soon became mortal enemies with Nelson freeing several from the evil influence of The King. But The King would have his victories too. And after The King unmasked the Knight he wrestled under his real name Norton Nelson. Nelson soon became the Queen Mum's favorite wrestler. She prodded her daughter Queen Elizabeth herself to knight him and he became Sir Norton Nelson after the Queen of England performed the deed amidst much pomp and circumstance which had The King (whose own claim to the throne is sketchy at best) fuming. Nelson has also appeared in several Merchant Ivory films* with cameos in A Room With A View, Howards End, and their 7/10 masterpiece The Tea Cosy. 

*The only films worth watching according to benevolent boss Mr. Staley.

Jeeves was The King's butler. The King had another longtime sidekick known as The Jester and there is much confusion over who played The Jester and who played Jeeves so I am going to clear it up once and for all. The Jester was played by Terrance J'Ollive who would later go on to be babyface mime je m'appelle Jérôme and this Jeeves was played by Laurence Jupp. Not to be confused with the second Jeeves who was played by Finch-Fletchley Jjones.

Purple Cow was a fat no name jobber in purple whom The King rudely named. Yeah, it was basically the Kidco storyline 2.0. 

Maryland Man was....a man from Maryland. He had one really big fan in this guy Daniel who had some influence on the promotion. Maryland Man would later have a son follow in his footsteps by becoming a wrestler. His name? Maryland Man Son. Duh.

Italian Stallion was a longtime jobber as my ripoff of NWA's Italian Stallion. Then I watched Rocky and he got a big push for a little while. Would later form a championship winning tag team with his brother Lenny. Yep. Lenny Stallion. Guess that means this Stallion's first name is Italian?

Peter Moneybags was my Ted Dibiase ripoff and Jupiter my Virgil ripoff. "Jumpin" Jim Jupiter was just babyface Virgil. This might be the real life storyline I ripped off the hardest. 

Indian Chief was more a Wahoo ripoff than a Tatanka ripoff. My Tatanka ripoff will come later.

Mr. Oregon was really, really proud of being from Oregon. Think a great value Maryland Man. Yikes. That's pretty low. Mr. O also formed a championship winning tag team with the Miner 49er as The Pioneers. Alas, poor Mr. Oregon would tragically die of dysentery while The Pioneers held the tag titles. Kit Carson would replace Mr. Oregon in the tag team. Miner 49er tends to feud with rich guys like The King and especially Peter Moneybags. Moneybags pulled off a swindle with the help of CC McManus where they took over legal rights to the 49er's mines and confiscated all his hard earned shiny minerals. Major bummer. The rich guy hating Miner actually does predate Henry Godwinn by a good 2-3 years. So I'll give myself the Barry Horowitz pat on the back for that one. 

Most notable thing about Tugboat Thomas is he was JYD's figure because for some reason my brother and I thought real life Tugboat would be black. Tugboat Thomas (which is how real life Tugboat was originally billed) was such a cool name that we couldn't wait to see what he actually looked like before we brought him to our league.

Bruno (just Bruno) was Peter Moneybags' hired goon in his war with "Jumpin" Jim Jupiter. Bruno would later become Mr. Morris. NEVER call him Bruno or Bruno Morris nowadays. He doesn't like that. It's just Mr. Morris now. He's upgraded, you see. The Bronx goon is always willing to sell out to the highest bidder. He is currently teaming with Chicago southsider Mr. Smith as The Thumb Breakers where they serve as shady lawyer/super agent CC McManus' "collection agency" whilst dressed in dark suits and shades in the style of Men In Black. 

Jebidiah "Doc" Otis was like ECW Al Snow in that for a very short time he was the most over person in the universe. He singlehandedly ended the St. Louis Lemon Riots of 1982! Then he went around planting so many lemon trees that folks 'round these parts took to calling him Johnny Lemonseed. He planted another seed in the wanton innkeeper and to this day remains the only person to achieve a doctorate in the singular science of Lemonology. Oh, and he won the TV Title, too. But that's honestly like the 35th coolest thing he ever did. The immortal Doc Otis can best be summed up by three succinct words...




Red Baron is a high flying German with a fondness for red. At only 227 pounds he's one of the lightest wrestlers to ever hold gold in the promotion. His slingshot splash finisher has pinned many a bigger man. He previously formed a moderately successful big/little bad guy tag team with "The European Union" Pierre von der Schnopf. The Baron succeeded where big Pierre failed by taking the TV Title from Doc Otis. The Baron then surprised everyone after losing the strap to Sailing Seaver when he shook the good guy's hand and congratulated him on a clean victory. This led to a good guy turn for the Baron and a feud with the much larger von der Schnopf which the Baron surprisingly won. He even forced PvdS to leave town! Yet since then The Thumb Breakers have put Red on the shelf with injuries leaving his legions of new fans to ask...



Sailing Seaver followed in the Baron's footsteps by winning the TV Title while primarily being a tag team specialist. His high flying good guy team with Dave Stewart is not a complete Rockers ripoff. Nope. Not at all.   Fwiw Seaver won the title Stewart was injured (by the Bohemians) and there has been a modicum of friction in the team ever since.

Seaver's name is somewhat misleading. It came from a chapter on Tom Seaver in a baseball book which referenced Tom Terrific's "sailing fastball." My Seaver didn't start out as an actual sailor, as in the captain of a boat. Instead the the name referred to how he sailed through the air. His name probably should have been Soaring Seaver in hindsight. Whatever. I was like 10. But years later the youngest of the Three Brothers took his name literally and I found it funny so I retconned him into being sea captain. I'm sure the fact that his finisher was The Cannonball only complicated things. But for now he's still just a high flyer. For now... 

The Timekeeper is the current TV titleholder. He's also undefeated since leaving the timekeeper's table for the rough and tumble world of the squared circle. His gimmick is he's a former timekeeper who scouted all the wrestlers for months from the best seat in the house. Therefore he knows all their strengths and weaknesses due to seeing them for so long from so close. He's also a mighty cocky fellow who announces before the match how long it will take for him to win. Then he wins in under the allotted time. He has yet to fail in this endeavor. Gonna be a tough one to dethrone... 

Meet The Boss: Mr. Staley

Benevolent boss Mr. Staley is Vince McMahon & Jack Tunney rolled into one. He is both fan friendly owner and fan friendly commissioner. But he wasn't always so friendly...

Mr. Staley's origins remain shrouded in mystery. His youth is as much a secret as his first name (ask him and he'll say "Mister"). What we can confirm about the Staley story begins in mid 20th century Decatur, IL. He's already in his early 20s when his name first shows up in town records (with his first name conveniently blacked out for reasons I'll get to in a little while). The hard-scrapping young Staley used his lucky #1 dime to buy into a floundering textile business. Within a few years he had taken over the entire outfit and turned the once failing endeavor into the leading textile outfit in Decatur. Then he bought up all the pumpkins in Decatur one summer to drive the price up to inordinate rates just in time for Halloween season. He made a killing on that scheme. Then he expanded his empire by springing into sprockets and finding new ways to creatively craft cogs. After that he turned his golden touch to the import-export business. The man had the Midas Touch and before long had dipped his magic finger into every pie in Decatur.

Yet he made few friends and many enemies during his rapid climb to the top. For Mr. Staley was a cold, cruel, calculating creep who got his kicks by bankrupting other businessmen, firing his own employees for the most petty of reasons, and pitching pennies to the poor out the window of his limousine just to watch them fight over the shiny coppers. When the people complained about his shady dealings he paid them back by hording up every food stuff in the region save beets. Old timers in Decatur still remember with a shudder that sad "Season of the Beet" where they were forced to eat the beet for 90 days or risk starving to death. It's rumored half a dozen hardcore beet haters chose to die of starvation during this purple plague rather than eat the beet.

In short, Mr. Staley was a world class jerk....a world class jerk with aspirations. His goal was to turn Decatur into his own personal fiefdom (he largely succeeded in the short term). Then Illinois. Then the United States of America. And finally the world. With politicians and police in his pocket, Mr. Staley ruled the town of Decatur. And he ruled it with an iron fist. Many of his critics disappeared. Though accounts vary on whether these dissenters simply fled the town or met their end through more sinister means. Some say the one newspaper he didn't own gave him his famous nickname. Others claim Staley coined the term himself in a Macchiavellian move. Whatever the truth he was soon known far and wide as "The Decatur Dictator." 

But the good people of Decatur finally had enough of this petty tyrant who only got richer as they got poorer. The last straw was Staley's scheme to eschew paying wages entirely (paltry though they were) and bring back slavery. This was too much for the people of Decatur and they went old school by running the would be dictator out of town with torches and pitchforks. 

Then came "The Lost Year" when Mr. Staley once again disappeared from all public records before finally turning up again in sleepy Hickory County, MD just below the Mason Dixon Line. Staley was still a very rich man from his Decatur days and he soon set about turning Hickory County into Decatur East. This was when he met up with G. "Skulls" Skultnick who would become his personal driver, truck driver, head of security, and all purpose goon. Staley ran rings around the completely unprepared Hickory hayseeds and soon monopolized all major local industry just as he had done in Decatur...

Until the sinister Staley finally met his match when he set about turning Hickory County's wild woods, pleasant parks, fertile farmland, and fields of fun into boring carparks and dull gray office buildings. And he met his match in the most unlikely of adversaries- a group of plucky young animals who simply didn't wanted to preserve their green and pleasant lands. These young animals banding together to challenge Mr. Staley broke something in that cold, cruel man. His heart grew 3 sizes bigger as he was confronted by the awesome Power of Friendship. Mr. Staley soon cast hate aside entirely as he finally learned the Power of Love. And for that we have true heroes to thank...

The amazing animals were led by doggie pillow Theodore (Thad to his friends) and his rabbit girlfriend, now wife, Elinor (Eli to her friends). They were ably aided by the perpetual puppies Mario & Blackie, cool cats Paisano & Pretzel Stick (P.S. to his friends), lovable Little Dolphin (L.D. or Lyle to his friends), the dynamic dinosaurs George, Griffin, and Marc (pronounced "Mairk" in the French style), silky smooth Snakey (who disappeared forever in a tragic game of hide and seek gone horribly wrong), persistent Pirate the armadillo & honorable Honus the raccoon (who were somehow brothers), and finally friendly Felix the hand. 

Forever changed by those awesome animals, Mr. Staley now devoted his life to doing good in atonement for his past sins. He had dabbled in sports in the past. He once founded a baseball league in which representatives of the NINE planets + asteroid belt traveled around the cosmos playing each other for solar system supremacy. Then there was his football league which boasted such notable names as Ron Lancaster & Elvis Patterson. And we mustn't forget his 50 team basketball league which saw all the best amateur players in the nation represent their respective home states.

But the ultimate purpose of all those leagues was to put more coin in Mr. Staley's pocket. Now he was all about giving back to the community. He rebuilt the Hickory* little league sports program he had just destroyed during his Car Parks & Office Buildings phase. Feeling so good about doing good, Staley then decided to fund the other little league programs in the various regions of Hickory County- Livington (home of Johnson Blvd. resident G. "Skulls" Skultnick) to the north, tough South Hickory, Francais with its heavy French population, the county breadbasket in rural Erdin, scenic Ectopia, neighboring rivals Mason & Dixon, and finally historic Taneytown. Before long the amateur athletes of Hickory County were finally able to topple their mighty neighbors to the north- Westdale and Delta just across the state line in Pennsylvania. Staley ensured his name would live on forevermore when he built the magnificent Hickory Sports Palace in Hickory which is basically an early 90s American version of London's famed Crystal Palace...only for sports. The people of Hickory County wanted to call it the Staley Sports Palace in honor of their benevolent benefactor, but Staley wasn't having it.

So beloved is Mr. Staley that the various regions of Hickory County, which are often feuding over one thing or another, set aside regional differences to unanimously elect him mayor of the County. Yes, he got 100% of the vote. Yet again Mr. Staley rejected the honor, taking an "absolute power corrupts absolutely" stance. Ironically the man who once wanted to rule the world now wants nothing to do with power. He's given millions of dollars to his adopted home for this project or that. He's also done the same for his old stomping grounds of Decatur, IL. 

*Hickory is the county seat of Hickory County and the closest thing the county has to an actual city. Meaning they have a Main St. Yeah, it's really more of a big town or village. Hickory is also home to all those animals I mentioned earlier. South Hickory recently broke away from Hickory proper in a referendum due to having a completely different culture. Maybe one day I'll recreate the map of Hickory County just for fun even though it has nothing whatsoever to do with this promotion beyond the involvement of Mr. Staley.

And finally we get to the wrestling stuff. Staley took a more hands on role in running the wrestling promotion he has owned dating way back to his Decatur days. He is now a fan friendly owner/commissioner in the style of 1995 Gorilla Monsoon. His most notable edict to date is the famous "350 Pound Rule" which bars all wrestlers over 350 pounds from competing in the promotion. Staley feels wrestlers that large have an unfair advantage. And the stats bear that out as really big boys like The 8th Wonder, Master of Disaster, Bald Chauffeur, Skulls, and especially Giant George have dominated the promotion over the years as Staley once dominated Decatur.

But the 350 pound rule is not without controversy. It does have some detractors who deem it unfair and discriminatory. Sleazy lawyer/super agent CC McManus has been the most vocal critic. And The King has lobbed the occasional jape at Staley and his rule. The overwhelming majority of fans and wrestlers alike are in strong support of Staley banning the bigs, but something tells me we have not yet heard the last of the gripers gripes...

Tag Title History

The Dream Team (Abruzzi Slugger & Mr. Wrestling)	6/3/71	12/6/71	186 days
The Cajuns (Claude "Big Hit" Baker & Big Al Beauregard)	12/6/71	5/22/72	168 days
Mighty Waters (The Captain & The Bosum)	5/22/72	8/27/72	97 days
Texas Outlaws (Bob Boone & The Texecutioner)	8/27/72	5/30/73	276 days
The Jolly 'Jacks (Hot Biscuit Slim & Cream Puff Fatty)	5/30/73	11/21/73	175 days
The Cajuns (2)	11/21/73	2/9/74	80 days
North To Alaska* ("Big" Sam McCord/George Pratt/Brother Billy)	2/9/74	5/8/74	88 days
Texas Outlaws (2)	5/8/74	5/13/75	370 days
The Kings of Wrestling (The King & Mr. Wrestling)	5/13/75	11/27/75	198 days
Texas Outlaws (3)	11/27/75	5/1/76	156 days
The Russians (Russian Bear & Russian Tower)	5/1/76	7/4/76	64 days
The Bicentennial Boys (Alan & Bull)	7/4/76	9/11/76	69 days
The Punks** (Spike/Spud/Rex)	9/11/76	10/23/76	42 days
F Troop** (Fidler/Feidler/Fernbatch)	10/23/76	12/7/76	45 days
The King and His Court** (King/Black Knight/Jeeves)	12/7/76	2/8/77	63 days
Texas Outlaws (4)	2/8/77	10/29/77	263 days
Phobos & Deimos	10/29/77	5/4/78	187 days
Star Warriors (Garth Vader & Luke Starwalker)	5/4/78	6/26/78	53 days
The Royal Family (King & Black Knight)	6/26/78	12/25/78	182 days
The Jive Tones (Fireman Parsons & Chocolate Thunder)	12/25/78	4/12/79	108 days
The Royal Family (2)	4/12/79	5/28/79	46 days
Abruzzi Slugger & Italian Stallion	5/28/79	2/29/80	277 days
The Sheiks (Steel Sheik & Sheik Hussein)	2/29/80	7/4/80	126 days
America's Team (Johnny Freedom & The Crusader)	7/4/80	4/26/81	296 days
The Russians (2)	4/26/81	7/4/81	69 days
America's Team (2)	7/4/81	12/29/81	178 days
The King's Court (Jeeves & The Jester)	12/29/81	3/15/82	76 days
The Anti-Monarchist League (Doorknob Clinton & Steamboat Gordon)	3/15/82	6/20/82	97 days
The King's Court (2)	6/20/82	7/28/82	38 days
The Explorers (Ponce DeLeon & Santiago)	7/28/82	10/21/82	92 days
The Russians (3)	10/21/82	12/25/82	65 days
America's Team (3)	12/25/82	4/15/83	111 days
The Royal Family (3)	4/15/83	5/30/83	45 days
The Brothers McGee (Good Dog McGee & Bad Dog McGee)	5/30/83	10/31/83	154 days
The Darkside ("Old" Abram Brown & The Gravedigger)	10/31/83	2/11/84	103 days
Men of Science (Doc Simpson & Bio McCracken)	2/11/84	6/2/84	112 days
Far East Connection (Mitsu The Rising Sun & Tenjyu The Samurai)	6/2/84	7/4/84	32 days
East-West Express (Maryland Man & Mr. Oregon)	7/4/84	10/6/84	94 days
The Royal Family (4)	10/6/84	12/25/84	80 days
Men of Science (2)	12/25/84	3/31/85	96 days
The Chauffeurs (Bald Chauffeur & Hairy Chauffeur)	3/31/85	4/7/86	372 days
The Rivers (Moon River & Lazy River)	4/7/86	2/7/87	306 days
Heinie & Boto	2/7/87	3/27/88	414 days
The Chauffeurs (2)	3/27/88	11/26/88	244 days
Heinie & Boto (2)	11/26/88	4/2/89	127 days
The Busters (Big Buster & Little Buster)	4/2/89	8/28/89	148 days
Heinie & Boto (3)	8/28/89	4/1/90	216 days
The Rivers (2)	4/1/90	7/28/90	118 days
The King and His Court II*** (King/Jeeves/The Jester)	7/28/90	8/27/90	30 days
Sailor's Delight (Sailing Seaver & Tugboat Thomas)	8/27/90	11/22/90	87 days
The Sheiks II (Sheik Hussein & Sheik Gubiata)	11/22/90	1/19/91	58 days
The Minutemen (Johnny Freedom & Star Spangled Bengal+)	1/19/91	4/13/91	84 days
The Rising Sun (Tenjyu & Kitoa)	4/13/91	6/1/91	49 days
The Lumberjacks (Lumberjack Jess & Ole The Big Swede)	6/1/91	8/26/91	86 days
The Elite (The King & Peter Moneybags)	8/26/91	10/12/91	47 days
The Pioneers~ (Miner 49er & Mr. Oregon)	10/12/91	11/19/91	38 days
Sons of the Pioneers= (Miner 49er & Kit Carson)	11/27/91	12/3/91	6 days
The Bullies (Bonecrusher Smith & Bodybag Jones)	12/3/91	1/19/91	47 days
The Stallions (Italian Stallion & Lenny Stallion)	1/19/92	4/5/92	77 days
The Bohemians (Herman & Daxon)	4/5/92	Present	159+ days

*Brother Billy filled in for "Big" Sam McCord when Sam from Seattle had to return home for personal reasons.

**Third Punk Rex debuted by interfering to cost The Bicentennial Boys the tag titles. The titles then briefly became de facto 6 man titles defended under "Punk Rules." F Troop beat The Punks. Then The King & His Court beat F Troop. This 6 man madness finally ended when the Texas Outlaws duo decisively wiped the floor with the King & His Court.

***Over a decade later the King would bring it back as "Royal Rules." The King claiming credit for something he didn't do to begin with is so King.

+This incarnation of the Star Spangled Bengal is current American Champion the Boston Strongman. The Strongman got his start here as the protege of a returning (and sadly past his prime) Johnny Freedom. 

~Mr. Oregon tragically died of dysentery in the midst of his tag title run with the Miner 49er.

=Mr. Staley thought it only fair the Miner keep the tag titles and be allowed to pick a new partner. The fans agreed and the Miner chose Kit Carson as his new partner.

Tag Title Stats

Ranking. Team Name (Individual Names): # of reigns-days as champ

1. Texas Outlaws (Bob Boone & Texecutioner): 4-1065
2. Heinie & Boto: 3-757
3. The Chauffeurs (Bald Chauffeur & Hairy Chauffeur): 2-616
4. America's Team (Johnny Freedom & The Crusader): 3-585
5. The Rivers (Moon River & Lazy River): 2-424
6. The Royal Family (The King & Black Knight): 4-353
7. Abruzzi Slugger & Italian Stallion: 1-277
8. The Cajuns (Claude "Big Hit" Baker & Big Al Beauregard): 2-248
9. Men of Science (Doc Simpsons & Bio McCracken): 2-208
10. The Russians (Russian Bear & Russian Tower): 3-198
11. Kings of Wrestling (The King & Mr. Wrestling): 1-198
12. Phobos & Deimos: 1-187
13. The Dream Team (Abruzzi Slugger & Mr. Wrestling): 1-186
14. The Jolly 'Jacks (Hot Biscuit Slim & Cream Puff Fatty): 1-175
15. The Bohemians (Herman & Daxon): 1-159+
16. The Brothers McGee (Good Dog McGee & Bad Dog McGee): 1-154
17. The Busters (Big Buster & Little Buster): 1-148
18. The Shieks I (Steel Sheik & Sheik Hussein): 1-126
19. The King's Court (Jeeves & The Jester): 2-114
20. The Jive Tones (Fireman Parsons & Chocolate Thunder): 1-108
21. The Darkside ("Old" Abram Brown & The Gravedigger): 1-103
22. Mighty Waters (The Captain & The Bosum): 1-97
23. The Anti-Monarchist League (Doorknob Clinton & Steamboat Gordon): 1-97
24. East-West Express (Maryland Man & Mr. Oregon): 1-94
25. The Explorers (Ponce DeLeon & Santiago): 1-92
26. North To Alaska ("Big" Sam McCord/George Pratt/Brother Billy): 1-88
27. Sailor's Delight (Sailing Seaver & Tugboat Thomas): 1-87
28. The Lumberjacks (Ole The Big Swede & Lumberjack Jess): 1-86
29. The Minutemen (Johnny Freedom & Star Spangled Strongman): 1-84
30. The Stallions (Italian Stallion & Lenny Stallion): 1-77
31. The Bicentennial Boys (Alan & Bull): 1-68
32. The King & His Court I (King/Black Knight/Jeeves): 1-63
33. The Sheiks II (Sheik Hussein & Sheik Gubiata): 1-58
34. Star Warriors (Garth Vader & Luke Starwalker): 1-53
35. The Rising Suns (Tenjyu & Kitoa): 1-49
36. The Elite (The King & Peter Moneybags): 1-47
37. The Bullies (Bonecrusher Smith & Bodybag Jones): 1-47
38. F Troop (Fidler/Feidler/Fernbatch): 1-45
39. The Punks (Spike/Spud/Rex): 1-42
40. The Pioneers (Miner 49er & Mr. Oregon): 1-38
41. Far East Connection (Mitsu The Rising Sun & Tenjyu The Samurai): 1-32
42. The King & His Court II (The King/Jeeves/The Jester): 1-30
43. Sons of the Pioneers (Miner 49er & Kit Carson): 1-6

20 Longest Reigns

1. Heinie & Boto (1)- 414
2. The Chauffeurs (1)- 372
3. Texas Outlaws (2)- 370
4. The Rivers (1)- 306
5. America's Team (1)- 296
6. Abruzzi Slugger & Italian Stallion- 277
7. Texas Outlaws (1)- 276
8. Texas Outlaws (4)- 263
9. The Chauffeurs (2)- 244
10. Heinie & Boto (3)- 216

11. The Royal Family (1)- 203
12. The Kings of Wrestling- 198
13. Phobos & Deimos- 187
14. The Dream Team- 186
15. America's Team (2)- 178
16. The Jolly 'Jacks- 175
17. The Cajuns (1)- 168
18. The Bohemians- 159+
19. Texas Outlaws (3)- 156
20. The Brothers McGee- 154

Individual Tag Title History

1t Bob Boone & Texecutioner: 4-1065
3t Heinie & Boto: 3-757
5. The King: 8-691
6. Johnny Freedom: 4-669
7t Bald Chauffeur & Hairy Chauffeur: 2-616
9t The Crusader: 3-585
10. Abruzzi Slugger: 2-463
11t Moon River & Lazy River: 2-424
Black Knight: 5-416
Mr. Wrestling: 2-384
Italian Stallion: 2-354
Claude Baker & Big Al Beauregard: 2-248
Doc Simpsons & Bio McCracken: 2-208
Jeeves: 4-203
Russian Bear & Russian Tower: 3-198
Phobos & Deimos: 1-187
Sheik Hussein: 2-184
Hot Biscuit Slim & Cream Puff Fatty: 1-175
Herman & Daxon: 1-159+
Good Dog McGee & Bad Dog McGee: 1-154
Big Buster & Little Buster: 1-148
The Jester 3-144
Mr. Oregon: 2-132
Steel Sheik: 1-126
Fireman Parsons & Chocolate Thunder: 1-108
"Old" Abram Brown & The Gravedigger: 1-103
The Captain & The Bosum: 1-97
Doorknob Clinton & Steamboat Gordon: 1-97
Maryland Man: 1-94
Ponce DeLeon & Santiago: 1-92
"Big" Sam McCord & George Pratt: 1-88
Sailing Seaver & Tugboat Thomas: 1-87
Ole The Big Swede & Lumberjack Jess: 1-86
Star Spangled Strongman: 1-84
Tenjyu: 2-81
Lenny Stallion: 1-77
Alan & Bull: 1-68
Sheik Gubiata: 1-58
Garth Vader & Luke Starwalker: 1-53
Miner 49er: 2-52
Kitoa: 1-49
Peter Moneybags: 1-47
Bonecrusher Smith & Bodybag Jones: 1-47
Fidler/Feidler/Fernbatch: 1-45
Spike/Spud/Rex: 1-42
Mitsu The Rising Sun: 1-32
Brother Billy: 1-<12
Kit Carson: 1-6